


Amsterdam

by sal_si_puedes



Series: Amsterdam [2]
Category: Actor RPF, The Old Guard (Movie 2020) RPF, The Old Guard RPF
Genre: Amsterdam, Amsterdam porn, Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blow Jobs, Cooking, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Hand Jobs, M/M, Matthias ex machina, Misunderstandings, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, RPF, Recreational Drug Use, Resolved Misunderstandings, Rimming, Sexual Roleplay, Smut, Soixante-Neuf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-03
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:20:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 27,405
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27372568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sal_si_puedes/pseuds/sal_si_puedes
Summary: After the virtual press tour for “The Old Guard” ends, Luca travels to Amsterdam to visit Marwan. They haven’t seen each other in a couple of months, ever since the Covid-19-related travel restrictions have been put into place, and now that “non-essential” travel is opening up again, it is time for a reunion. They have a week.Sequel toStrictly Professional. Set in August 2020. Oh, those sweet summer days.......
Relationships: Marwan Kenzari/Luca Marinelli
Series: Amsterdam [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2018255
Comments: 80
Kudos: 134





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: This is RPS (Real Person Slash) - if that's not your cuppa, don't read.
> 
> Also, I'd like to quote hollybennett123's disclaimer again: "Everyone here in this very fictional and definitely imaginary alternate universe is single or otherwise available and just having a really good time." <3
> 
> I'd also like to say (again) that only the names of the guys are real, everything else about them is completely made up. Fiction.  
> Everything Amsterdam- and Antwerp-related is real (places, locations, customs, food, drink...) - the rest is fiction! (Even the people who might or might not make an appearence are fictional.)
> 
> I don't know where Marwan lives, but in my headcanon he moved to Amsterdam when he became a member of the ensemble of [toneelgroupamsterdam](https://tga.nl/medewerkers/marwan-kenzari), and in this fic he lives in [this loft (visual aid #1)](https://homeworlddesign.com/vondelpark-loft-amsterdam-standard-studio/).
> 
> I want to thank [hollybennett123](https://hollybennett123.tumblr.com/) from the bottom of my heart for the inspiration and for the beta! Equally heartfelt beta thanks go to [Kaerith](https://blueskaerith.tumblr.com/). You two rock my socks, and I can't thank you enough!!!
> 
> _Je kan er boeken kopen  
>  Die je hier heel zelden vindt  
> Je kan er langs de grachten lopen  
> Je haar los in de wind  
> Je kan er uren slijten  
> De parken zijn er groen  
> Je kan er naar Van Gogh gaan kijken  
> Dat zou je eigenlijk wel eens moeten doen_
> 
> _Je bent er vogelvrij  
>  Omdat er alles kan  
> Zo dichtbij en toch zo ver is Amsterdam_
> 
> _Want daar in Amsterdam  
>  Ben jij zo ver van mij  
> Toch voel ik Amsterdam  
> Zo pijnlijk dicht nabij  
> En toch so ver is Amsterdam_  
> [[Kris de Bruyne, Amsterdam](https://youtu.be/Kas-aiY83D0)]
> 
> Translation (by me, hence not very 'poetic'...):
> 
> _You can buy books here  
>  That you only very rarely find  
> You can walk along the canals,  
> Your hair loose in the wind  
> You can spend (= “waste”) (your) time here,  
> The parks are green  
> You can go and look at Van Gogh here –  
> And that’s what you “should” (/are supposed to) do._  
>  _You are free as a bird here  
>  Because everything’s possible here  
> So close and yet so far away is Amsterdam._  
>  _Because in Amsterdam  
>  Are you so far away from me  
> Yet I feel Amsterdam  
> So painfully close (to me)._

It’s a little after 2:30 pm, and Luca should have been here an hour ago, but his plane has taken off from Leonardo DaVinci with a little over an hour’s delay. He had texted Marwan as soon as he had known, but Marwan left his loft at 1 pm, nevertheless. He has had a cup of coffee already at one of the tables outside _Café Karpershoek_ from where one has not quite a clean, but at least a good view of the Renaissance Revival red brick station building. His phone’s alerts to Luca’s two texts updating him that he has landed safely in Schiphol and that he is on a train now to the city make Marwan’s stomach lurch. He orders another cup of coffee, but he leaves that one almost untouched. 

Around ten past two, he pays for his coffees and walks over to the main entrance where he’d told Luca he’d wait for him. Or rather, where Luca had told him to wait for him. It’s another quarter of an hour to go. 

_almost there just a few more minutes to go_

Marwan’s still pacing the pavement in front of the entrance when his phone pings again.

_am here will be out in a minute_

Marwan smiles and pockets his phone. He exhales against his left palm to test the smell of his breath and runs his fingers through his hair. Even though it’s not that warm today, his palms are slightly sweaty, and even though he hasn’t been pacing fast or anything, he feels slightly out of breath.

The weather is better today than it has been the last couple of days, only partly overcast and no rain, temperatures around 20°C, and the forecast is filled with a beautiful promise of summer. That could be the good side of the coin that had pushed back Luca’s trip another ten days, so maybe it’s okay after all, that it’s August already, not July anymore as they had still hoped it would be during the virtual press junket.

The station is still a lot less busy than it had been before the lockdown, but it is busy. Marwan’s eyes scan the flood of people exiting the building frantically until they find a familiar face. Well, the upper half of a familiar face since Luca is still wearing his mask. 

Luca waves at him, duffle bag slung over his shoulder and cell phone in hand, and even though the mask is still covering half of his face, Marwan can see that he’s smiling.

“Hey,” Marwan yells, the smile on his face mirroring Luca’s. He starts walking towards Luca, his steps gradually accelerating, and his smile broadens when the mask finally comes off and he can see Luca’s face. Luca’s entire wonderful face, including his beaming smile.

They stop to a halt three steps apart, but only for a second or two. Then they both close the distance at the same time, Luca lets his bag fall to the floor, and they’re in each other’s arms, patting each other’s backs, laughing. 

The pats turn to something more along the lines of caressing strokes for a moment before they still entirely, and the hold of their arms around each other tightens. 

“I would have gotten you from Schiphol,” Marwan mumbles against Luca’s temple, Luca’s skin and Luca’s hair warm and lovely against his lips. 

Luca nods. “I know,” he says before he rests his head on Marwan’s shoulder.

Marwan closes his eyes and inhales deeply, and he can feel how Luca does the same. When Luca exhales, there is a small sigh in it that Marwan can feel everywhere. For a couple of heartbeats, they just stand still like that, holding each other close.

When Marwan starts to break the embrace and tries to take a step backwards because, well, it seems like time to do just that, Luca shakes his head. 

“Not yet,” Luca murmurs against Marwan’s shoulder. “I’ve missed this too much.”

Marwan nods and tightens his embrace again. Luca feels good in his arms, really good, warm and solid and real. The rising and falling of Luca’s chest against his own is more soothing than he’d have ever thought possible. It soothes a soreness, an ache Marwan hasn’t even been aware of until now.

When they finally do break apart, Luca smiles, his eyes still closed, and stills. 

“Hey,” Marwan whispers and brushes his lips over Luca’s. “How was the trip?”

“Long,” Luca says as he opens his eyes, and his smile fades.

“You look tired.”

“You look _okay_ ,” Luca deadpans, a grin spreading on his face after a second or two, and Marwan can’t help but join him in that. 

“Thank you,” he chuckles, bending down sideways to pick up Luca’s bag, but Luca beats him to it. Luca slings the strap over his shoulder again and lets his phone slide into the inside pocket of his jacket. Then he shoves the mask that has still been in his hand as well into one of the side pockets and grins. 

“Ready when you are.”

Marwan nods. He steers Luca in the direction of the tram stop with a gentle hand on his arm. “I’ve got a bike for you at home,” he says and laughs when Luca stops dead in his tracks, staring across the Stationsplein and the Westertoegang at the bikers speeding along the Prins Hendrikkade and across the green traffic lights in front of _Café Karpershoek_. “You are from fucking _Rome_ , Marinelli!”

“Yeah,” Luca murmurs, still frowning. “But I wouldn’t take a bike there either. I don’t have a death wish.”

“You’ll be fine,” Marwan says, locking eyes with Luca when he stops staring at the bikers and turns his head around to face him. “How long can you stay?”

They haven’t really made plans yet, the situation with the pandemic still being volatile, and neither of them has dared to believe that this was really going to happen, that they’d really get to see each other again after all the postponements. So, all Marwan knows at this very moment is this: Luca is here. 

“A couple of days,” Luca says, and an expression flashes over his face that Marwan can’t quite place. “A week, maybe?”

Marwan nods. “Okay. It’s good to have you here.” He gestures at one of the tram stops. “That one’s ours. We can take the 2 or the 12, but then it’s a little longer to walk.”

When they make their way over there, the backs of their hands brush against each other, and it feels like a bolt of lightning shooting through Marwan’s body. They brush against each other a second time, and Marwan catches Luca’s hand in his, giving it a small squeeze. Then he lets go of it again and shoves his right hand into the right back pocket of Luca’s jeans, pulling him against him. When Luca’s arm worms its way between Marwan’s arm and his side and wraps around Marwan’s lower back, Marwan takes a deep breath and smiles. 

Having Luca in his arms feels amazing. They have a couple of days, maybe even a week. Things are looking really good.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know where Marwan lives, but in my headcanon he moved to Amsterdam when he became a member of the ensemble of [toneelgroupamsterdam](https://tga.nl/medewerkers/marwan-kenzari), and in this fic he lives in [this loft (visual aid #1](https://homeworlddesign.com/vondelpark-loft-amsterdam-standard-studio/)).

The tram ride takes roughly twenty minutes, and Luca looks out of the window almost the entire time, even though the first few minutes their ride takes them along the Nieuwezijds Voorburgwal, which is definitely not one of Amsterdam’s most beautiful streets. His hand is resting on Marwan’s thigh, and from time to time he moves his thumb in an absentminded caress. It’s almost enough to drive Marwan out of his mind, it feels so good. 

Marwan reaches for Luca’s hand and takes it in his when they reach ‘t Spui, the square where the main building of Amsterdam’s university is located, and Athenaeum, Amsterdam’s best bookstore. He tells Luca that that is what they’re looking at, his favorite bookstore, and suggests going there while Luca is here, and Luca nods.

“And a have a beer in one of those pubs,” Luca says, pointing at the neighboring _Cafés Hoppe_ and _Zwart_. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Marwan nods and tightens his hold on Luca’s hand a little because he knows what’s coming once they’ve turned the corner and left ‘t Spui. And he wants to hold Luca’s hand when it happens.

They pass into the _grachtengordel_ , Amsterdam’s famous Canal Belt, and being there for Luca’s first glimpse of it is magical. 

Luca’s eyes go wide, and his fingers tighten around Marwan’s. Then he quickly turns his head to lock eyes with Marwan, and Marwan nods, smiling. The next moment, Luca’s head is turned again, and he’s looking out of the window once more.

“ _Bellissimo_ ,” he whispers, and Marwan’s smile broadens. “I already had a very quick look from the train but then I was busy texting you, so I didn’t really get to see.”

“Wait till you really see it, then,” Marwan says, brushing over Luca’s pulse point with his thumb. “Wait till we can walk along the _grachten_ , maybe later today, or maybe tomorrow. It’s going to be sunny tomorrow and we…” Marwan falls silent when he realizes that Luca isn’t listening to him at all. The smile stays on his face, though, and the warmth of Luca’s hand in his spreads through his entire body. 

Luca points at things, and asks questions about what is this and what is that, and the entire time they’re on the train, a route that Marwan has taken a thousand times before, it feels more exciting than any other journey he’s ever made. He simply can’t stop smiling.

It’s just a short walk from the stop they get off the tram to Marwan’s building. Luca’s still smiling and he’s walking really close to Marwan, so Marwan shoves his hand into Luca’s back pocket again. Luca’s arm winds itself around Marwan’s waist just like it has earlier.

The feeling of Luca’s muscles against Marwan’s palm as they walk is exquisite. Just because he can, Marwan curls his fingers a bit inside Luca’s pocket, and Luca nearly stumbles. He does it again, just because he can.

“Stop that,” Luca chuckles. “You’re making me hard.”

“Good,” Marwan grins and does it once more, but then he pulls his hand out and gives Luca a nudge to the right. “We’re here.” He leads Luca through the archway and up the two flights of stairs with a hand on the small of his back, and the way Luca’s muscles flex against it makes him want to walk faster but Luca has the bag, and there’s no way he’s going to shove his guest up the stairs.

The keys jingle in his hand as he unlocks the door and opens it for Luca to step inside.

Luca crosses the threshold and slowly walks down the flight of indoor stairs that lead into Marwan’s loft, then, at the foot of the stairs, he carefully sets his bag down and walks into the living area. He stops at the dining table and looks around. He takes it all in – how the loft stretches from one side of the building to the other, the large windows on both ends, the kitchen in the middle of the place with the little breakfast table, the sliding glass doors, the openness, the two bikes hanging on the wall halfway to the bedroom, one above the other, the shelves, the books, the lamps, the floor. 

Marwan watches him closely. It’s always fun to watch Luca discovering something new, and having him doing that here, in his private space, his home, is mesmerizing. 

“Wow,” Luca says and turns around to look at Marwan. “Beautiful space.” He’s smiling, and Marwan walks down the stairs as if pulled by a magnet. _Woosh_ , just like Luca once said in one of their interviews. 

“Thank you,” he smiles, closing the distance between them and pulling Luca into his arms. The next moment, they’re kissing, and one of his hands is slipping under Luca’s shirt and running up his spine, and the other has found its way into Luca’s hair. 

Luca tastes amazing, and his lips are just as tempting and pliant as Marwan remembers them, maybe even more; and his tongue, fuck, his tongue is—

“Wanna see the rest of the place,” Marwan murmurs into their kiss, and Luca’s hands cup his face, and Luca nods. 

“Yeah. In a minute. And can I have a shower?”

Marwan nods, but instead of slowing down, Luca deepens the kiss, fucking Marwan’s mouth with his tongue so thoroughly it makes Marwan’s head spin and his cock throb painfully in his jeans. He’s already so hard it hurts, and he can’t even remember getting there. It’s as if he’s always been here, like this, desperate to get his hands on Luca’s naked skin, already close to the edge of coming.

Blindly, Marwan reaches for Luca’s belt, and makes quick work of it and of undoing the buttons of Luca’s jeans. 

“You’re worse than Joe when it comes to touching Nicky,” Luca groans before Marwan can seal his lips again.

When Marwan pushes Luca’s jacket from his shoulders and reaches for the hem of Luca’s shirt, Luca chases after the kiss, and as soon as his jacket and shirt are off, his mouth is on Marwan’s again. Marwan pushes Luca’s jeans and his underpants down, freeing Luca’s cock; and it is dark and hard and beautiful, and suddenly all Marwan wants is to take it in his mouth and to make Luca come.

“I want to suck you off,” he bites against Luca’s lips, and Luca moans, trying to lean down and shove his pants down further and at the same time trying to toe off his shoes. 

Marwan pushes him backwards, almost making him fall, until his ass touches the edge of the dining table. Then, he goes to his knees.

Luca’s leaning against the table, his arms behind him, his palms flat on the table’s surface. His cock twitches in Marwan’s hand, and Marwan gives it a small squeeze and licks his lips. When he looks up, Luca’s head is hanging, his chin almost touching his chest. Marwan lets his tongue dart out and touches it to the small clear drop of pre-come at the very tip of Luca’s cock, at the slit, and Luca’s head snaps up and his eyes fly open.

“Fuck,” Luca hisses, and his hips jerk, but Marwan holds him in place. “I think I could come just from that.”

Marwan licks his lips and then he licks over the tip of Luca’s cock again, teasing the slit a little. When Luca bites back another moan, Marwan grins and gives him a couple of quick strokes before he licks him a third time. Another drop of pre-come oozes from Luca’s cock, and Marwan wants to taste it, wants to taste Luca, he wants it so bad he can feel it everywhere. He leans forward a little and opens his mouth a bit, and when he takes Luca into his mouth slowly and deliberately, he replaces the pressure of his fingers with the pressure of his lips. 

Luca moans, and for a moment, his hand fists into Marwan’s hair, but then he places it on the table again, behind himself, to steady his stance like before. His cock swells even more, and his blatant arousal fuels Marwan’s beyond anything he has ever experienced. 

He wants to take it slow, but he can’t; the need to push Luca over the edge, to make him spend himself into Marwan’s mouth is too strong. And Luca urges him on with a string of moans and curses when Marwan begins to suck him off him in earnest.

Marwan can feel the exact moment Luca passes the point of no return, and that is when Marwan stills his movements for a moment, drawing a hoarse moan from Luca’s lips.

“Fuck,” Luca moans, and his body is trembling with his building orgasm. “Gonna—”

Marwan hums and moves his head again, palming himself through his jeans, in desperate need for friction himself. When Luca starts to spill, Marwan slows the pace a little and swallows around Luca’s pulsing cock until Luca’s finished and his trembling muscles relax.

He grins around Luca’s cock, swallowing one last time. Luca almost whines at the sensation. He must be so sensitive right now, humming with release, and Marwan can taste all of that on his tongue. He pulls off and stands up, unbuckling his belt and undoing his trousers. There’s a lubed condom in his pocket, and he takes it out and lets it drop on the table next to Luca’s hand. 

Luca is still catching his breath, his eyes closed, his face flushed and his lips bitten red. Marwan doesn’t know why or how, but, as always, Luca’s hair is a mess. He places his palm flat on Luca’s chest and gives Luca a gentle push. 

“Lie back,” he murmurs, shoves his pants over his hips and down to his knees and takes his fingers into his mouth, coating them with saliva. They taste of Luca, and it feels incredibly good sucking on them and licking between them. 

When Luca complies and lowers himself backwards onto the table’s surface, Marwan adjusts his position and reaches between Luca’s parted legs. He’s so hard and nearly dying to bury himself in that tight heat that he can only manage a sloppy and slightly rough preparation, but it’s also Luca’s fault, because he urges him on with moans and raspy words of encouragement, praise, arousal and need. 

With his mouth slightly open, Marwan’s eyes dart back and forth between Luca’s face and his hand working Luca open; his fingers inside of Luca’s body, and Luca’s body tight and clenching around them. When he can’t wait anymore, he pulls out and rolls the condom over his cock before he positions himself and pushes forward. 

The feeling of sliding into Luca’s body just like that is intoxicating, and it makes Marwan go a little weak in the knees. Once he’s fully inside, Luca tightens around him, and the moan that draws from Marwan’s lungs sends another wave of arousal through his body, causing his cock to jerk inside of Luca’s tightness.

Marwan bites his lips and shifts his stance the tiniest bit. 

“Fuck,” Luca murmurs, and his muscles tighten around Marwan once more. “You feel—”

“Yeah,” Marwan breathes, staring at how Luca’s entrance stretches around him, and he flexes his hips a little, savoring the subtle pleasure of being surrounded like that. 

“God,” Luca moans when Marwan does it again, and his hips roll, pulling Marwan even further inside. 

“Fuck, Luca—”

It’s like a switch being flipped, one small movement that sets in motion a whole chain of continuously accelerating, spiraling events, and soon Marwan is slamming into Luca again and again, his fingers digging into Luca’s thighs, and Luca’s back sliding over the table’s surface with every thrust of Marwan’s hips.

Luca isn’t fully hard anymore, but he’s clearly swept away with a pleasure so deep it makes his skin and his face glow with the intensity of it. 

Marwan bends forward and licks up Luca’s torso once, from his belly to the hollow of his throat, and when he rises again, he can feel his climax building in his groin. He’s going to come, and he’s going to come soon, soon, and suddenly all he wants is to see his come on Luca’s skin. It hits him like a shot in the chest, and somewhere at the back of his mind it registers that, if he wants that, he has to do something about it right now or it’ll be too late.

His fingers shake and his whole body trembles with his impending release when he pulls out and quickly rolls off the condom. He’s already coming when it fully comes off, and Luca’s eyes fly open as Marwan comes in hot, white spurts all over Luca’s upper body and groin.

“Fuck,” Marwan moans as he empties himself spurt after tantalizing spurt, staring at Luca’s body and his come on it, and he can’t stop himself from running his free hand through the stains and over Luca’s sweaty, come-stained skin. “Oh _fuck_. Oh _shit_ —” 

And he keeps coming and coming for what seems like forever, his body completely taking over, and it’s so good it’s almost too much. He has to lean forward and steady himself with one hand on the table, right next to Luca’s waist, and another bolt of climax runs through him, and another spurt of come lands on Luca’s skin.

When it finally ebbs, his throat feels sore and his fingers are almost cramping, and his entire body is vibrating with the receding waves of pleasure. His hold around himself relaxes a little, and he keeps stroking himself languidly, squeezing the last drops of come from his softening cock.

He shakes his head, and Luca chuckles.

“What was that?”

Marwan shakes his head again, his thoughts still a little fuzzy, and his mouth still unable to form words. He straightens his back and lets his fingers run over Luca’s come-stained stomach again.

“I don’t know,” he finally murmurs, still utterly bewildered. “I’ve never done that before.” He pauses and smiles. “Do you have any idea how hot this is? Do you?” He adds after another short pause. “How hot you are, like this? How much you turn me on all the fucking time?”

Luca catches Marwan’s hand in his and brings it to his lips. He places a soft kiss on his knuckles and smiles. From the glitter in his eyes, Marwan can see that he’s just had a thought, and as if in confirmation, Luca opens his lips and takes Marwan’s index finger into his mouth, licking it clean. 

“I think I might,” he grins before he takes Marwan’s middle finger into his mouth. “It’s the same for me. I feel like a teenager.” The ring finger is next, then the pinkie, and then the thumb. “I was going to take a shower at some point I’m sure,” he says when he’s done with that, and turns his head to the right. “Bathroom?”

Marwan nods and takes a little step backwards, his jeans pooling around his ankles. He pulls them up and winces as the cloth brushes over his overly sensitive cock. He reaches out, offering Luca a hand, and helps him sit up.

Luca hops off the table and looks down his body. “You made a mess of me,” he grins, looking up and locking eyes with Marwan. “Help me clean it up?”

*****

After their shower, they get dressed again, which takes them a pretty long time because they can’t stop touching each other. It’s as if it’s impossible for them not to have their hands on the other one’s skin, or skin against skin, warmth and a slight remaining wetness, and their cocks remain half hard the entire time, even though they’ve made each other come under the warm spray of the shower a second time. It’s as if their lips are filled with such hunger and thirst, such need they simply can’t break apart long enough to put on some clothes. 

Marwan picks up Luca’s bag from where he had dropped it earlier and carries it to the bedroom at the other end of the loft.

Luca follows just a step or two behind, and Marwan can feel Luca’s eyes on him, on his ass and on his back, and he likes that. He likes that so much that he drops the bag at the foot of the bed, reaches for Luca’s hand and pulls him in again, skin smooth against skin, water still dripping from Luca’s hair and their cocks stirring between their bodies.

“Hmmmm,” Luca hums, letting his hands slide down Marwan’s back until they’re cupping the cheeks of Marwan’s ass. Just the lightest pressure of Luca’s fingertips digging into his muscles makes Marwan moan. 

Slowly, he lowers himself onto the bed and pulls Luca down with him. It feels so right, so incredibly good, to have Luca lying on top of him, and Marwan opens his legs a little so one of Luca’s legs slides between them. Their groins touch, and Luca’s cock twitches, drawing an echoing twitch from Marwan’s.

“You feel so good,” Marwan murmurs into Luca’s ear, and Luca nods. Marwan’s stomach lurches, and he can feel his cock swell even more. It’s almost too much, and he can’t help but chuckle and shake his head. He feels even worse than when he was a teenager, and Luca giggles on top of him, and then Luca’s stomach growls, which sends both of them into a serious giggling fit. It only ends when Luca lifts his head and brushes his lips against Marwan’s.

“Food,” he murmurs, and Marwan lets his hand slide into Luca’s hair and brings their mouths together again for an open-mouthed kiss. 

“Real food,” Luca moans, rolling his hips. “ _Real_ food…”

“Yeah,” Marwan sighs playfully and gives Luca a gentle nudge so he rolls off him. Looking down at his already almost fully erect cock, Marwan shakes his head and grins. “Incredible.” He scrambles off the bed and takes some clothes out of the drawer, watching Luca getting dressed as well while putting on his clothes. When he’s done, he adjusts himself, still half hard, and runs his fingers through his hair.

“I also want to see a bit of the city,” Luca says, buckling his belt and mirroring Marwan’s improvised hair brushing. “Can we walk around a bit?”

“Yeah,” Marwan nods. “We can get some groceries on the way back home. But first, you’re going to have a _haring_.” He laughs when Luca wrinkles his nose. “Trust me, you’re going to love it.”

He knows Luca will; he knows Luca likes sushi, and this is going to be even better. By the time he leaves Amsterdam, Luca is going to be addicted. The thought makes Marwan smile.

On their way up the stairs to the loft’s door, Marwan can’t help but run his palm over Luca’s jeans-clad butt, and he has to rein himself in really hard not to shove him against the wall right here and now and just have him, here on the stairs, both his and Luca’s jeans halfway down their legs, their movements limited and their desire for each other entirely limitless. He bites his lips, pressing his palm against his crotch when they’re at the top of the stairs and he’s ready to slip into a jacket and grab the keys.

Lucas chooses to turn around in that exact moment, and Marwan winces.

“Sorry,” he mutters, his lips curling into a slightly embarrassed grin. “It’s your ass. It’s a problem.”

Luca reaches for him and pulls him into his arms. Canting his hips just so, he lets Marwan know that he’s in no better condition. “Later,” he murmurs against Marwan’s lips, and the sensation sends another wave of arousal through Marwan’s body. “Can’t wait… Now, food. Please.”

With a deep, shaky inhale, Marwan breaks their kiss, nods, and opens the door. When Luca has walked through it, he follows him and closes the door behind himself. For a brief moment, he leans his forehead against the door and closes his eyes. This time, he doesn’t let Luca catch him in the act.


	3. Chapter 3

Outside, they cross the street and Marwan heads for the bike stand at the bank of the canal. “I have the good ones upstairs,” he says, tossing a key to Luca, who catches it easily just like Nicky would have caught the empty shell of a deadly bullet or a gun tossed at Joe across a room. “Did you see them?” Luca nods, and Marwan smiles and points at a second bike next to the one he’s busy unlocking. “But I almost never use them. They’d get nicked in no time. I swear, the number of bikes I’ve lost since I moved to this city…”

They get on their bikes and at the next crossing, Marwan stops and points to the right. “That way.”

“The way we took here,” Luca says, but Marwan shakes his head.

“Same direction, but we’re going to take a nicer route. Less traffic-y. And I want to show you something.”

“Okay,” Luca says and gets onto his bike again. “Let’s go, then.”

They bike along Valeriusstraat, and there is just very little traffic, so Luca can look around to his heart’s desire. Marwan rides behind him, smiling as Luca’s head turns left and right, and as he keeps talking, gesturing, even, pointing at things like he had done on the tram. The skies have cleared completely now, and the thought that the weather is going to be really nice the next couple of days makes Marwan’s smile deepen. Maybe they’ll go to Vondelpark on one of the days, lie in the grass a bit and look at the sky. Maybe Luca’s head will be in his lap and maybe he can run his fingers through Luca’s hair as Luca takes a nap. Luca’s hair is still rather longish, he hasn’t cut it since the interviews, and Marwan likes that.

When they come to the end of the street, Marwan tells Luca to turn left, and then right again, and then left once more at the small square.

“We’re in the Museumkwartier now,” he says and gestures to the right, “the Museum District. That’s the Concertgebouw to your right and over there is the Stedelijk. Across that field,” he points in front of them, “that’s the Rijksmuseum. Same architect as the Centraal Station.” 

Luca nods, and they cross the street and bike across the field towards the Rijksmuseum. “Van Gogh is over there,” Marwan says shortly before they ride through the archway going through the middle of the Rijksmuseum, pointing to his left. There’s a street musician in the middle of the archway, and the song he’s playing is beautifully enhanced by the archway’s width and height. 

Once they’re through, they turn left and cross the canal after a short while. “That’s Leidseplein,” Marwan says and wrinkles his nose. “Tourist trap, far too crowded… But,” he adds after they’ve turned left again. He brings his bike to a halt, and Luca stops next to him. “I’ve been on stage there.” His hand points at a building on the left hand side of the road. “For a couple of years. That’s the ITA, the Internationaal Theater Amsterdam; everyone still calls it Stadsschouwburg, though, because of the building. They changed names a couple of years ago when they merged with—never mind, long story. They still keep me listed as part of the ensemble. I miss it, sometimes.”

Luca turns his head and locks eyes with Marwan. He nods. “It’s special,” he says, slowly, his eyes never leaving Marwan’s. “Different. Theatre. I know.” The corners of his mouth curl a little, and he adds, “I wish I could have seen you on stage.”

“Yeah, me too,” Marwan says, and he realizes only moments later that that might mean more than one thing. He wonders which meaning Luca chose. “Come on, let’s get you something to eat, then,” he says after a short pause, and they mount their bikes again.

On their way to ‘t Spui they stop a couple of times so Luca can take it all in, and once more Marwan can’t help but marvel at the beauty of Luca here with him, at his side, in this town. The herring booth Marwan wants to take Luca to is just around the corner.

Marwan orders two herrings, traditionally served with freshly cut onions and a little bit of pickle and a toothpick with a little Dutch paper flag at the end, and Luca’s initial scepticism towards the Dutch delicacy fades after he’s taken his first bite.

Luca’s eyes flutter shut, and an expression spreads on his face that can only be described as ecstatic. “It’s like butter,” he moans, and Marwan chuckles. “It’s even better than that. Oh my god.”

“Told you you’d love it.”

Quickly, Luca stabs the toothpick into another of the small pieces, and the expression of bliss on his face intensifies when he puts it into his mouth. “Can I have another one?”

Grinning, Marwan picks up a piece of his own herring and brings it to his mouth. He nods. 

Luca finishes his fish with almost lightning speed, and when he mumbles, mouth still full with the last little bite, “I really should savor this more,” Marwan can’t help but laugh. He orders a second round of herrings, even though the Amsterdamers almost always eat only one at a time. It’s just too much fun to watch how much Luca enjoys this. 

“Time for a beer?” Marwan asks when Luca has finished his second herring and is wiping his mouth with a paper napkin. “It’s tradition to go for a beer after one of those. And we had two.”

Luca nods. “If it’s tradition… Then I’ll take two beers, too.”

It’s just a short walk to ‘t Spui now, so they push their bikes, and when they’ve reached the square, they lock them up right at the corner. 

“ _Hoppe of Zwart_?” Marwan asks, and Luca frowns. “Which of the two cafés do you want? _Café Hoppe_ or _Café Zwart_ ” Marwan extrapolates, gesturing at the neighboring pubs with only a narrow alley running between them.

Luca shrugs. 

“ _Hoppe_ , then,” Marwan grins and steers Luca to one of the high tables in front of the café. “It used to get pretty crowded here around this time of the evening,” he adds once they’ve found their place. “But since Covid…” His voice trails off, and for a couple of moments, both he and Luca just watch the square.

He’s definitely going to take Luca to Athenaeum while he’s here, and maybe they’ll go and have dinner at _Kantij_ l around the corner, too. Maybe they can even sit outside. 

When the waiter approaches their table, Marwan orders two beers, _vaasjes_ , which is the customary size at a _bruin café_ like _Café Hoppe_ , he explains to Luca and fills him in on all the other glasses of different sizes and their names, and then he tells him that no Dutch person would ever order any beer a larger size than a _vaasje_ , unless it’s a special kind of beer. 

The first beer goes down quickly after the herrings, and Marwan orders the next round before they’ve even finished their first.

“We could go out for dinner tonight,” he says, his eyes glued to Luca’s upper lip and the way he licks a residue of beer off it. “Or we can get some groceries and eat at my place. I can cook us something if you want.”

Luca contemplates that for a moment, sipping on his beer, a slight frown on his face.

“Your place,” he finally says, and their eyes meet briefly over the rim of their glasses. “I want to stay in tonight. You can cook.”

Marwan’s been hoping Luca would say that, so he nods, smiling. “We get some food on our way back home then,” he says, “and we stay in.”

When they’ve finished their second beer, Marwan pays, and they set off on their first stroll along the canals. On one of the many bridges, they stop, and Luca leans back against the railing.

“What’s that?” he asks, pointing at a tall tower in the distance.

“De Westertoren,” Marwan replies. “It’s the bell tower of the Westerkerk. The top part is made of wood, actually. We can go up there one day if you like.” At that exact moment, the Westertoren’s famous carillon begins to play.

Luca frowns. “It’s beautiful, the bells.”

“There’s a great café right across the street, and one of my favorite ones is on its other side, really just around the corner as well. I’ll take you there.”

Luca nods. “ _Sarebbe bello_ ,” he says, and it actually takes Marwan a moment to catch on to it. He grins and stakes a step towards Luca, stepping into his personal space. Luca’s hand moves to Marwan’s hip immediately, and Luca smiles. Marwan watches how his eyes slowly flutter shut.

Leaning in, he can almost taste Luca’s lips when his phone buzzes in his pocket. He groans, and Luca chuckles. Marwan takes a step backwards and fishes his phone from his pocket. As soon as he sees who’s calling, a huge grin spreads on his face.

“It’s Matthias,” Marwan says, and Luca breaks into a beaming smile as well. “ _Hej, klootzak_ ,” Marwan accepts the call, and his grin broadens. “Whassup?”

Marwan listens to whatever Matthias is saying for a moment, something about how everything’s fine, and how he just wanted to check in with Marwan since he hadn’t heard from him since a couple of days after the press tour, and his eyes meet Luca’s. The distinct look of concentration in Luca’s eyes startles him a little, and his brows furrow a bit.

Luca’s expression softens almost immediately, and he smiles.

“Yeah,” Marwan says, returning Luca’s smile. “ _Raad eens wie hier is._ ”

 _Prins Pilsje_ , Matthias teases? _Johann Cruijff? Sintaclaas?_

“ _Beter_ ,” Marwan shakes his head, his eyes never leaving Luca’s face. Of course it’s better to have Luca here than the King, a soccer legend or Santa Claus. Of course. “ _Hier. Wacht even._ ”

He hands his cell phone to Luca, and Luca grins.

“Booker,” he says, his voice stern and flat. “We told you one hundred years. Why would you be calling us now?”

Marwan can’t hear what Matthias is replying on the other end of the line, but it is something that makes Luca smile.

“Good, good, thank you,” Luca says eventually, nodding his head. “Yeah, today, a couple of hours ago. For a few days, a week maybe. Not sure yet.”

Marwan’s stomach does a little drop, and for a moment, there’s a sharp pain in his chest. Even though Luca has just arrived a couple of hours ago, he feels as if he’s missing something already when he hears Luca say those words. 

“Yeah,” Luca grins, adjusting his hold on the phone. “I’ll talk to him about it.” He hands the phone back to Marwan and turns around to face the other way, resting his hands on the bridge’s railing. 

“ _Kom naar Antwerpen_ one of these days. _Bezoek me_ ,” Matthias says. “ _De honderd jaar tellen vandaag niet mee._ Come. Bring the Italian.”

“Yeah,” Marwan says, watching Luca’s back, the curve of the back of his skull, the line of his spine underneath his light jacket, the curve of his ass. He can’t help but smile, and he wishes he were an artist, like Yusuf. “I’ll talk to him about it.”

After Matthias has said his goodbyes (“ _Doe het dan maar, lul. Bel mij op_ , okay?”), Marwan stores his phone away again and closes the distance, wrapping his arms around Luca from behind. “Matthias has invited us to come see him in Antwerpen while you’re here,” he murmurs into Luca’s hair, and he can feel Luca nod. “It’s just a little under two hours by train. Do you want to go?”

Slowly, Luca turns his head to the side and catches Marwan’s lips in a sloppy kiss. Marwan’s hand comes up and cups Luca’s face, and Luca adjusts his position, and now the kiss can really happen.

“Yeah,” Luca rasps after a couple of moments, breaking their kiss again. He clears his throat. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

“Me, too.” Marwan catches the lobe of Luca’s ear between his teeth and briefly keeps it there. Then he nuzzles at Luca’s throat and hums. “How about we get some food and head back to my place?”

“I’d like that even better,” Luca murmurs, giving Marwan better access to his throat. “I think I could go another round soon. Food-wise, I mean.”

“Of course,“ Marwan chuckles. “Of course, that’s what you meant.”


	4. Chapter 4

On their way back to Marwan’s place, they stop at an _Albert Heijn_ , and Marwan buys some pita, fresh vegetables, some chicken, Greek yoghurt and two bottles of wine. While he’s waiting at the cash register, Luca choses a small bouquet of flowers, which is actually quite nice given that it comes from a supermarket’s selection, but this is the city of flowers, after all. Marwan grins.

“Sap,” he says, and Luca grins back. 

“You didn’t have any at home,” he says, “so I thought I’d get you some. It’s a Nicky thing. I wanted to get you some at the airport but all they had were bulbs. I didn’t want to bring you bulbs.”

Shaking his head, Marwan pays for the groceries, but Luca insists on paying for the flowers.

“Didn’t know you cooked,” Luca says when they’re biking back to the loft, and Marwan scoffs. 

“Of course I cook. Couscous okay?”

“And what if I said no?”

“Are you saying no?”

“No,” Luca grins, pedaling a little harder and overtaking Marwan. He looks back over his shoulder, and his face is lit up by a smile so bright Marwan feels blinded for a moment. “I love couscous. Can’t wait.”

Back at Marwan’s place, they lock their bikes, and since Marwan is carrying the groceries and the flowers, he motions for Luca to take the keys from the pocket of his jacket to unlock the door to let them in. It feels good, watching Luca do that, at least it does for a moment. Then, a dull pain stabs Marwan’s chest, and he has to shake his head quickly to make it go away. 

Marwan washes his hands in the kitchen, one bottle of wine goes into the deep freezer and the other into the fridge, and then he begins dinner preparations immediately. Luca’s in the bathroom, and when he reemerges from there, Marwan is busy dicing the vegetables. Some vegetable stock is heating up on one of the back burners, and he’s set the pan on the left front one to a medium-high temperature with a bit of oil in it because he wants to sauté the chicken first.

Luca steps up behind him and wraps his arms around Marwan’s torso. His breath is hot against the nape of Marwan’s neck as are his lips and his tongue, and when he breaks the embrace again after just a short moment to turn off the two gas flames, Marwan frowns.

“Don’t come on the food,” Luca murmurs and rolls his hips against Marwan’s ass. He’s rock hard, and when he brings his hand to Marwan’s crotch, it doesn’t take Marwan more than a couple of seconds to catch up with him in that department.

“What?”

Something must be wrong with his brain because he isn’t capable of any clear thoughts, especially not when Luca’s palm presses against his erection and Luca rolls his hips again.

A small, low moan falls from Luca’s lips and runs down Marwan’s spine. Luca’s hands find their way to Marwan’s belt buckle and his fingers make quick work of the belt and the buttons. “You heard what I said,” Luca says, sliding one hand inside Marwan’s pants and repeating that motion of his hips. “Don’t turn around. And don’t come on the food.”

Quickly, Luca pushes Marwan’s trousers and underpants down over his hips and undoes his own trousers. His foot worms its way between Marwan’s and nudges them apart a little. “Spread your legs a bit,” Luca murmurs, and the timbre in his voice goes straight to Marwan’s cock.

“Fuck”, Marwan hisses when slick fingers run down his crack and slow down when they brush over his hole. “Fuck, Luca—”

“Shhhh,” Luca shushes, coating his fingers with more lube and repeating the gesture. This time, he pushes one finger inside, and Marwan moans, shifting his stance a little, desperately trying not to fuck himself on Luca’s finger. “I said _shhhh_ ,” Luca whispers. “They’re in a safe house, and the others are right next door at the dining table. They have to be quiet.”

Luca’s preparation is sloppy, but Marwan doesn’t care. He’s so turned on by the time Luca withdraws his fingers and rolls the condom over his cock that his whole body is trembling with arousal and need. Even though the tip of Luca’s cock is already nudging against his entrance, he wishes Luca would hurry up and—

Completely contrary to his own instructions, Luca moans loudly as he pushes inside, and the moan fills Marwan’s senses the same way Luca’s cock fills his body. His eyes squeeze shut tightly, and his hands grab the edge of the kitchen countertop so hard his knuckles turn white.

Luca feels exquisite, and Marwan’s cock hardens even more. He thinks about grabbing hold of it, but that’s when Luca starts to move, and all Marwan is able to do is let it happen. With every thrust with which Luca fucks into him his arousal increases, and soon, very soon, he’s cursing under his breath. He doesn’t even know in which of the many languages between them they speak. His body longs to spread his legs further and to push back into Luca’s thrusts, but the jeans around his knees prevent him from giving in to what it begs him to do. The frustration is torture, and through his lust-addled brain he can hear Luca chuckling, but when Marwan’s body tightens around him his chuckle turns into another one of those insanely delicious, devastating moans.

“Fuck,” Luca hisses and presses his forehead against the nape of Marwan’s neck. His hips stutter, and he pauses. His cock swells inside of Marwan, and it feels as if he’s never been so close, so wound-up in his entire life. “God, you feel so fucking good—”

Marwan can clearly hear how Luca bites his lips and swallows around another moan when Marwan clenches his muscles around his cock again. “Shit—”

The fingers of Luca’s right hand wrap around Marwan’s cock, and before Luca moves again he begins to stroke Marwan, slowly and deliberately, running his thumb over Marwan’s crown on every stroke until Marwan thinks he’s going to go insane with the sheer pleasure of it. 

Luca’s trembling with the effort to hold back. Marwan can feel that and he’s not so sure if he can do what he’s been told to do. Or rather: told not to do if Luca keeps this up much longer.

When Luca bites down into his shoulder, Marwan’s hips jerk and Luca’s respond, accompanied by the beginning of a curse that turns into a moan before the word is fully formed. The movements of Luca’s hand accelerate, and soon he’s fucking into Marwan in earnest. They’re both breathless with it already, Marwan’s lips moving silently, begging Luca to do something, anything really, just—

Luca must have a sixth sense for things like that, because the exact moment before Marwan’s about to tumble over the edge he lets go of Marwan’s cock and his hips stutter.

“Don’t,” he moans, and his fingers dig into Marwan’s hips so hard the pain almost does what Luca’s fingers have been kept from doing. “Fuck, don’t—”

And then Luca fucks into him one more time and stills. Marwan can feel how Luca’s climax claims him and how he empties himself inside, and it’s all Marwan can do not to follow him. The amount of effort it takes him is indescribable, and he doesn’t even realize that he’s constantly murmuring under his breath.

The sounds Luca is making ring through Marwan’s entire body, and Luca is still moaning when he pulls out, turns Marwan around and goes to his knees. He grabs hold of Marwan’s cock and takes him into his mouth, his lips warm and pliant around it. The sight of it all is so breathtaking Marwan’s knees almost give in as well.

Before Marwan knows it his fingers are fisting into Luca’s hair, and his orgasm is building blindingly behind his eyes and in his groin. It doesn’t take him more than a couple of erratic sloppy fucks into the wet heat of Luca’s mouth before he comes so hard he sees stars, and Luca takes it all. 

He swallows around Marwan’s cock, and Marwan can feel its crown hit the back of Luca’s throat. It’s more intense than anything he’s felt before. Again. His head falls back, and his hips stutter, the last ebbing waves of release washing through his body.

When his eyes open again and he looks down, Luca’s just letting his cock slip from his mouth, his lips sticky with come and saliva. Luca’s eyes are wide and dark with lust and pleasure, and his lips are so red it seems almost impossible. He smiles. 

“Good?”

Marwan shakes his head and laughs, still dizzy with climax. “That was incredible. _You’re_ incredible.” He holds his hand out and helps Luca to his feet. “Come here.” Luca is warm and solid against his chest when Marwan pulls him into his arms. Suddenly, there is nothing more important than to taste himself on Luca’s lips, and for a moment their kiss feels like drowning. Something tugs at Marwan’s stomach, something somewhere deep inside of him, and when his spent cock brushes against Luca’s the sound Luca kisses into his mouth makes his chest tighten with longing. “Incredible,” he kisses against Luca’s lips before he breaks the kiss and pushes Luca a little backwards. He winces.

“We need another shower,” he says, and Luca grins. 

“Yeah, it seems we do.” He pulls his jeans up and places a soft kiss on Marwan’s lips. “Coming?”

“Just did,” Marwan grins and pulls his pants up as well. “Thank you.”

****

After the shower, Marwan finishes cooking, and when dinner is ready, they sit down at the dining table together. Luca has put the flowers in a vase Marwan didn’t even know he had, he’s laid the table and he’s poured them two glasses of wine. The loft looks warm and happy, and Luca looks warm and happy in it.

Marwan sets the bowl with their food down between them, turning it around so Luca can grab the spoon. He tears one of the pita breads in half and hands Luca one of the halves.

Not to praise himself, but the food is delicious, and the wine is nice; it’s fresh, vibrant and cool. Their conversation flows easily, just like during the days they were working together, and the nights, later. They talk about anything and everything, and the hours pass without them even noticing. 

“So,” Marwan says, and pours the rest of the second bottle of wine into their glasses. “Plans.”

Luca nods. “I want to go to that bookstore of yours, and I want to have another herring. And maybe go to that Indonesian place you mentioned, have dinner? I want to cook for you, too. And have another herring. And have another herring.”

“I think that can be arranged,” Marwan smiles and reaches for Luca’s hand. He brings it to his lips and places a soft kiss onto Luca’s knuckles. “We have time. And the herring catch was a good one this year, so…” He reaches for his glass and takes another sip. “And go to Antwerpen, of course. Go see Matthias. We can do that the day after tomorrow or maybe on Friday. I’ll check with Matthias tomorrow, after breakfast. See when it fits best for him.”

“Good.” Luca reaches out, brushes his thumb over Marwan’s lips and nods. “And I want, you know…”

“I might have an idea, yeah,” Marwan says with a grin on his face, then he pushes his chair back and grabs their empty glasses. “I’ll clean this up, you can have the bathroom first.”

When he’s done with stacking the dishwasher and clearing away the remains of their dinner, he heads for the bathroom himself and quickly changes into his sleeping clothes, a t-shirt and a pair of boxers. He finds Luca standing by the window in the bedroom, clad in almost exactly the same way. 

Luca’s looking out of the window into the back yard, and he startles a little when Marwan clears his throat. Then he turns around and smiles.

“Why don’t you get in,” Marwan asks softly and nods at the bed. “You must be tired.”

“We’ve never done this before,” Luca says slowly, his eyes following Marwan’s, and his smile falters a little. “Just gone to bed like this. Together.” He pulls his lower lip between his teeth and worries it a bit. 

“Do you want me to sleep on the couch?” Marwan asks, a little angry with himself that he hasn’t offered that before. “I can—”

“No,” Luca shakes his head and locks eyes with Marwan again. “No, I don’t want that. It’s just… I’m not sure how to do this…”

They hold each other’s gazes for a moment in a silence so tense Marwan can hear his heart beating in his chest. He longs to feel Luca’s body against his again, languid and warm with tiredness and sleep and then slowly awakening to a new day. He wants that so bad it hurts deep down in his stomach.

He picks up the edge of the covers and slips underneath. Then he holds up the other side for Luca. “Come on. Get in. Get some sleep. You really must be tired.”

Slowly, Luca nods and slips underneath the covers next to Marwan. He’s in Marwan’s arms and nestled against Marwan’s shoulder a second later, and Marwan can feel him smile against his t-shirt.

He buries his nose in Luca’s hair and inhales. “You really smell so good,” he murmurs, letting his eyes flutter shut.

Luca smacks his lips and stifles a small yawn. “I smell like your shower gel,” he mumbles and yawns again. 

Marwan chuckles. “You smell like you.”

Tentatively, Luca moves his leg so it slots up between Marwan’s, and his hand comes to rest on Marwan’s chest. He takes a little bit of the soft fabric of Marwan’s t-shirt between his thumb and index finger, just so very close to Marwan’s left nipple and carefully worries it between them. 

“Is this okay?” Marwan asks, and his heart aches with tenderness. 

Luca nods and a small, content sigh falls from his lips as he adjusts his position a little. “I think when they have a bed, a real bed, and when they feel safe, they fall asleep like this. Don’t you?”

Marwan nods. Luca feels good in his arms and against his side, and the way his head moves against his shoulder and causes the fabric of his t-shirt to brush against his skin rekindles his desire, and his cock begins to swell. He groans, as silently as possible. Luca is tired, he’s had a long day, and he needs some sleep, and he really shouldn’t—

Luca chuckles and brushes his fingers over Marwan’s nipple deliberately, making Marwan gasp and his cock twitch. Then, he rolls his hips, letting Marwan feel his own growing arousal.

Their lips find each other in the dim light, and halfway into their kiss, Luca has rolled on top of Marwan, and their hips are rocking against each other so sweetly it makes Marwan dizzy. Hands worm their way under clothing, hungry for skin and touch, and when Marwan’s hands slip into Luca’s boxers to cup his ass, Luca moans. He’s rock hard against Marwan, and there’s far too many layers of cloth between them, far too little skin on skin, but Marwan’s far too foggy with arousal to really do anything about it. 

He tries to shove Luca’s boxers over his hips, but he can’t, and when Luca catches his lower lip between his teeth and bites it, Marwan’s brain short circuits.

“Fuck,” Luca hisses, frotting against Marwan’s body, his cock throbbing and his breathing shallow and erratic. “Too many clothes—”

Marwan nods and parts Luca’s ass cheeks with greedy fingers. “Yeah,” he moans, breaching Luca’s body with his middle finger, desperate to be inside, to feel Luca around him again. “Yeah, fuck—”

He groans in frustration when Luca shifts and his finger slips out again, but then Luca sits up and pulls his t-shirt off. His fingers burn hot against Marwan’s skin when he reaches for Marwan’s t-shirt, and Marwan raises his upper body just enough to let Luca take his shirt off as well. Then he pulls Luca against him again, his skin burning and his desire growing with every breath he takes. Somehow, they manage to shimmy out of their boxers, and somehow lube and a condom find their way to his hands, and just a blink of an eye later, he’s moving inside of Luca, and Luca is gradually falling apart underneath him. Marwan can’t believe how good this feels, how good Luca feels, and that he’s going to come again, the fourth time this day, and he never, never wants it to stop.

They’re kissing when they’re coming this time, their lips starving for each other’s moans, and when they reach their peak it’s so good it hurts. Marwan empties himself deep inside of Luca’s body, and Luca shoots his release between their bodies, hot and sticky and glorious, and it’s a little bit like dying, really. 

They’re so out of breath at the end of this, and it takes Marwan a moment to realize where he is. He can’t believe he’s still hard. Luca is pulsing around him, his muscles contracting in yet another wave of climax, and his palms slide over Marwan’s back slick with sweat. When Marwan moves just the slightest bit, Luca’s fingers dig into the muscles of his back hard, and Marwan can feel how another strand of release spills from Luca’s cock.

“Oh, fuck,” Luca gasps, and this little gasp of pleasure is the most delicious drink Marwan has ever had. “Oh my god…”

Marwan lowers himself down onto his elbows and frames Luca’s face with his hands, letting his thumbs brush over his cheeks.

Luca’s eyes are closed, but when Marwan places a soft kiss on Luca’s slightly open lips, they flutter open, and the look Marwan finds in them causes his heart to miss a beat.

“Wow,” Luca whispers, and Marwan kisses him again. “I thought we were going to sleep…”

“Too many clothes,” Marwan replies, brushing his lips over Luca’s in a gentle caress. “Couldn’t have that.”

Luca nods, and Marwan winces when he shifts a little. As good as Luca’s come feels on his skin now, they need to clean up before they go to sleep.

“I can’t believe I’m still hard,” Marwan murmurs when he pulls out. Luca watches him intently when he takes off the condom, and when it’s off Marwan looks up to meet Luca’s eyes. “What you do to me…”

Luca grins and reaches for Marwan’s cock to give it a gentle stroke. “Beautiful,” he murmurs, and Marwan’s hand comes to cover his.

“Stay here,” he says and scrambles to the edge of the bed. “I’m going to get a washcloth. You really need some sleep.”

He comes back a moment later with a wooden shaving bowl and a washcloth, and he cleans them both up, reveling in the different textures of the skin of Luca’s chest and lower belly, on the inside of his thighs and on his cock. The intimacy of feeling the weight of Luca’s cock in his hand makes his chest tighten, and when he sets the bowl aside, he has to close his eyes for a moment. 

Slipping underneath the covers a second time, he exhales shakily. When he pulls the covers up, Luca slots up against him once more, and their lips meet for a soft kiss.

“Better,” he says, and Marwan nods, closing his eyes and savoring Luca’s warmth against his skin. 

“Yeah. Much better.” He listens to Luca’s even breathing until he drifts off himself.


	5. Chapter 5

It’s in the middle of the night when Marwan wakes up the first time. He’s wide awake, and Luca is sound asleep next to him. A faint hue of light from a lantern in the backyard falls through the window, bathing Luca’s sleeping form in a soft hue of light. 

Luca’s lying on his side facing Marwan, and his shoulders are uncovered and his features soft with sleep. Marwan’s dying to reach out and touch, but he doesn’t want to risk waking Luca up. For a while he lets his eyes wander over Luca’s face and body. Thinking about who that is, who it is who’s lying next to him, naked and asleep, here in his home makes his chest expand and his heart flutter with joy.

It’s getting harder and harder to keep himself from touching, so Marwan slips out from underneath the covers and leaves the bedroom as quietly as possible. He closes the sliding door behind him and makes for the living room. His guitar is in its case, leaning against the wall next to the sofa, and he opens the case quietly and takes the instrument out and sits down on the sofa.

His fingers still smell of Luca, and he inhales deeply while he’s tuning the strings. When he’s finished, he starts to play quietly, closing his eyes and feeling the soft vibrations of the guitar’s wooden body against his naked skin. His cock begins to stir, and he smiles. He’s too thoroughly fucked, too satisfied to become fully aroused, but this feels nice. Thinking of Luca back there in the bedroom, shoulders uncovered and lashes painting shadowy circles on sleep-soft cheeks, feels nice. Thinking of Luca’s lips feels nice.

At the back of his mind, Marwan can hear the sounds of a sliding door and of naked feet on the wooden floor. His smile broadens.

“Why are you up,” Luca asks, his voice groggy with sleep. “Is something wrong?”

Marwan shakes his head and opens his eyes. “No,” he says and stops playing. “Just couldn’t sleep. Did I wake you up?”

Luca shrugs and comes closer, sitting down on the other end of the couch. Yawning he turns sideways and draws his feet up, slinging his arms around his knees. He looks adorable with his tousled hair and his small middle-of-the-night eyes, and Marwan can’t stop staring.

Just when Marwan moves to put the guitar back in its case, Luca shakes his head. “No,” he says. “That was beautiful. Don’t stop.”

Marwan is happy to oblige. “I saw you playing in ‘Fabrizio’,” he says and tilts his head a little. “You were good.”

“Not like this,” Luca says and rests his head on his arm. “This is beautiful.”

“It’s Flamenco,” Marwan says, and Luca nods.

“Yeah.” Luca begins to sway back and forth a little, and Marwan can hear him humming quietly. “When did you learn to play?”

“I started in my last year of high school”, Marwan replies, changing the tune a little so it becomes even softer. “I already knew I wanted to go to drama school after, and I knew I needed an instrument, so—” He seizes playing for a second and gives the guitar’s body a gentle tap. “I really like playing. I don’t nearly play enough these days,” he adds, shaking his head. “Not really taking the time for it. Stupid, I know.”

“You have time now,” Luca says, smiling, and lets his eyelids flutter shut. “You can play a bit now. I’ll listen. I would offer to sing, but I’m a little tired. I’m sorry.”

“Another time, then,” Marwan says, and Luca nods, the soft smile still lingering on his lips.

“Hmmm,” he murmurs, and his arms around his knees tighten a little. “Yeah, another time.”

Watching Luca closely, taking in every tiny movement, sound and expression, Marwan plays for another ten minutes or so, and then he leans the guitar against the wall and places a gentle hand on Luca’s arm. “I’m ready to go back to bed,” he says, and Luca opens his eyes. Marwan tilts his head so he can look Luca in the eyes. “Are you joining me?”

“Yeah,” Luca nods, and loosens the hold on his legs. “Let’s go back to bed.”

*****

When Marwan wakes up the next time, the room is filled with light, rays of sunlight dancing in warm patterns on his face, and he can feel himself smiling. The other side of the bed is empty, but he can smell coffee and he can hear Luca rummaging in the kitchen, so he just closes his eyes again for a moment and listens. Clatter, something being poured into something, and footsteps, just like only a few hours ago. Naked feet on wooden panels. And just like a few hours ago as well, Marwan opens his eye when the footsteps come to a halt.

Luca’s there, at his side of the bed, stark naked and beautiful, and he’s carrying two steaming coffee mugs. The smile on his face is warmer than the sunlight. After a moment or two, his smile turns into a grin. “We have to buy espresso,” he says, shaking his head.

“I have tea?” Marwan tries as self-defense, but Luca’s having none of it.

“And a _caffettiera_. I can’t believe you don’t have espresso.” Luca tilts his head and narrows his eyes a little, and his brows furrow.

“Bedhead?” Marwan asks, and Luca’s grin broadens.

“I would say ‘nicely tousled’, but—” He sets both mugs down on the bedside table, next to the bowl with the washcloth, and sits down on the edge of the bed. “But you cut it. I can’t believe you cut your hair and shaved your beard.” He runs his hand over Marwan’s head and then over his jaw.

“Not completely,” Marwan says and stretches. “It was—” Luca crooks his fingers and runs his knuckles over Marwan’s cheekbone. “It was getting a little out of hand,” he says, sitting up against the wall in his back. He reaches for one of the mugs and takes a sip. “Thank you,” he says, and Luca smiles.

“You were sleeping,” Luca says, taking his own mug into his hand. “I didn’t want to wake you up.” Slowly, he brings it to his lips, and before he takes a sip, his eyes flutter shut. “Hmmmm,” he hums, cradling the mug in his hands. “It’s not espresso but it’s not so bad.”

Marwan smiles. Then he sets his mug back down again and takes Luca’s from his hands. He places it next to his and pulls Luca down and half on top of him. 

“Come here,” he says, and crooks a finger under Luca’s chin. “Good morning.”

Their kiss is soft and light, and Marwan simply can’t stop smiling. Luca tastes like coffee and sleep and sunlight and warmth. Marwan hums into their kiss, and he can feel Luca smile as well.

“It’s going to be a beautiful day,” Marwan says when they break apart for air. “What do you want to do?”

“Hmm,” Luca murmurs, furrowing his brow. “Let’s see. Bookstore, maybe have picnic lunch in the park like you said we could, eat a herring, eat a second herring, have a beer, have dinner at that Indonesian place. Oh, and you.” When he says that last thing, the tone in his voice changes, and it takes on a note that speaks of hunger, arousal, desire, need. It goes straight to Marwan’s cock, and, as one quick glance confirms, to Luca’s as well.

“Hold that thought,” Marwan pulls Luca in for a quick, open-mouthed kiss. “I need to piss.”

He quickly gets out of bed and makes his way to the bathroom where he relieves himself and drinks a bit of water from the tap. He looks at himself in the mirror, already half hard, and he can’t resist running his hand over his chest and stomach and taking himself in hand. He bites his lips when his cock swells in his hand. He rolls his hips lazily and gives himself a couple of light strokes. 

“Hey, don’t start without me in there,” Luca calls from the bedroom, voice husky with arousal. Apparently, Marwan has made some kind of treacherous noise.

Back in the bedroom, Luca’s lying on his side, one hand in his hair and the other curled around his cock. He’s slowly fucking into his loose fist, and it has to be the most erotic thing Marwan has ever seen. He stops dead in his tracks and simply stares.

Luca bites his lips and runs his thumb over his slit. A thin sheen of moisture glitters on his crown.

“Fuck,” Marwan hisses, and his hand reaches for his own cock again. He goes from half hard to fully erect almost instantly. “You’re already—”

Luca nods, biting his lips even harder as his hips stutter and his cock twitches. His hold on himself tightens, and so does Marwan’s.

They watch each other through hooded eyes, and every time Marwan wants to take a step and to close the distance, desire shoots through his body, and he just can’t move. The mere thought of not watching Luca bringing himself off right there on Marwan’s bed for just one second, the though of missing even a single second of this is unbearable and keeps him rooted to the spot. When Marwan can feel his orgasm beginning to build, Luca’s eyes flutter shut, and he moans.

“I don’t think I—” Luca’s breathing hitches, and another low and desperate moan falls from his lips. “I want to, but I don’t think I ca—Oh _fuck_ —”

Marwan watches, eyes wide and fluttering heartbeat, how Luca arches into his touch and how he just comes. How he spills himself over his fingers and onto the sheets, gasping with every spurt, the most heartbreaking little sounds, and suddenly, Marwan is there as well, is _right there_ with him; he comes, too, and the intensity of it nearly sends him to his knees. 

The next thing he knows is that he’s on the bed next to Luca, and he has Luca’s fingers in his mouth and Luca has his, sucking, licking, drinking. Marwan’s cock is still pulsing, and he thinks he’s maybe not going to survive Luca’s visit with his sanity intact, he’s maybe not going to survive this incredible pleasure he finds in Luca _at all_. 

Luca lets Marwan’s fingers slip from his mouth, his lips red and swollen and glistening. “You keep doing that to me,” he murmurs, shaking his head. “Now the coffee’s gone cold.”

Marwan turns his head and casts the abandoned mugs a quick glance. “I can make fresh ones,” he says and pulls Luca close against him. “But shower, first.”

Luca nods into the crook where Marwan’s neck meets his shoulder, and Marwan knows that Luca’s going to drift off in a moment, but he doesn’t care. He closes his eyes and inhales deeply. Maybe he’ll allow himself a little nap as well.

*****

They sleep for almost an hour, and when they wake up again, all tangled limbs and sticky skin, Luca’s kiss tastes of sleep and sweat and come, and Marwan thinks that this is his favorite taste now. He drags Luca out of bed and into the shower, and after that he makes fresh coffee and fixes some breakfast which sets up for at the small breakfast table, not daring to take it to bed again. Luca is wearing the t-shirt that Marwan wore yesterday; he must have grabbed it while Marwan was making breakfast. It’s a worn-out t-shirt, old, soft cotton and the neckline is a bit ragged, but he looks beautiful in it, of course he does. Even more so when Marwan raises his eyebrows when Luca appears in the kitchen clad like that, and Luca merely smiles. “It smells like you,” he says, and Marwan’s heart misses a beat.

Marwan offers Luca fresh fruit, slices of peach and mango and pineapple, and a few cherries as well, and he watches Luca eat them piece by piece, licking the juice from his fingers in such a way that sends Marwan’s thoughts back an hour ago. The sun is already high in the sky when they finally leave Marwan’s loft and unlock their bikes. 

They make their way south to the Amstderdamse Bos where they bike around for an hour or so, and then Marwan steers them back to the city. They buy sandwiches and something to drink for their picnic lunch in the Vondelpark. 

When they’ve found a nice spot underneath a tree, they settle down on the ground, and Luca hands Marwan a sandwich. They eat in silence for a while, watching the other people in the park, playing with their kids, walking their dogs, enjoying the sun. Reading, taking pictures, smiling at each other.

“This—” Luca says, and his fingers brush against Marwan’s when he hands him one of the water bottles after he’s taken a long swig from it. “I think the people needed this. Need this, after everything.”

Marwan nods.

“I needed this,” Luca adds quietly. He bites his lips and looks away, and Marwan reaches for his hand. 

He says nothing. He just holds Luca’s hand lightly in his and waits.

“I—A friend of mine died because of the pandemic,” Luca continues, slowly, hesitantly. His hold on Marwan’s fingers tightens as he speaks. “From school. We were friends since school. She was one of the first to—in the North. Her husband survived, and their kid. Maurizio.”

“I am so sorry,” Marwan says after a while when Luca has fallen silent. Luca nods, and his fingers tighten a little more. “Luca.”

Luca looks up, but for the longest time he doesn’t meet Marwan’s eyes. When he does, Marwan understands why it has taken him so long. There are no tears, but the pain and the sadness reflected in them make Marwan’s throat constrict and his chest tighten. 

Luca nods again, biting his lips, and Marwan just pulls him into his embrace, and it’s awkward for a moment because Luca’s legs sort of tangle underneath him, but once he’s settled in Marwan’s arms, he lets himself be held.

“I needed this,” he mumbles against Marwan’s shoulder, and Marwan brushes his lips over Luca’s hair.

The tension slowly leaves Luca’s body, and his breathing becomes deep and even, and after a while he slides down until his head is nestled in Marwan’s lap.

Slowly, carefully, Marwan begins to run his fingers through Luca’s hair. It’s not much, but he’s glad that he’s getting to do at least that. 

His legs begin to fall asleep a couple of minutes after Luca does, and when Luca awakes again from his nap about half an hour later, Marwan can’t feel them anymore at all, but he doesn’t care. Luca blinks a couple of times, and with every blink the pain and the sleepiness recede, and a little more sunlight returns to his eyes. 

“Hey,” he murmurs and reaches up to cup Marwan’s neck and pull him down for a soft, featherlight kiss.

“Hey.” Marwan’s answer dances on the tip of Luca’s tongue like the sunlight breaking through the foliage dances on his cheeks. “Better?”

“Yeah,” Luca sighs and lets his eyelids flutter shut again. He stretches, his arms reaching above his head and around Marwan’s waist. “Much. Thank you.”

Marwan stretches his back and tries to hold back a wince. “I can’t feel my legs anymore,” he murmurs, and Luca chuckles. 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” His eyes open again, and he looks up at Marwan, grinning.

“You were sleeping,” Marwan replies and shifts again. This time, he doesn’t hide his discomfort so well, he suspects. 

“I’m awake now,” Luca says and tries to sit up, but Marwan’s hands hold him in place, and Marwan shakes his head. 

“Not yet,” he says, and runs his fingers through Luca’s hair once more. “I have thought about doing this for so long,” he adds and repeats the gesture. “Plus, it’s too late now anyway.”

Luca grins and lets Marwan have his wish for another minute or so before he does sit up, turns around to face Marwan and crosses his legs. He narrows his eyes a little, and Marwan feels as if he’s under severe scrutiny.

“What?”

“I want to watch you when they wake up again. Your legs.” 

It’s already happening, and Marwan sucks his lower lip between his teeth and bites down. “Shit,” he hisses when a thousand needles and pins begin to prick his legs.

“Do you feel it everywhere?” Luca asks, his eyes quickly darting to Marwan’s crotch before they meet his again. “I—When that happens to me, sometimes I feel it everywhere.”

“Stop it,” Marwan chuckles, but his grin contorts again as soon as he moves. “Shit. _Ouch._ Fuck. Don’t laugh. _Fuck_ , that _hurts_.” 

“Just breathe through it,” Luca grins, and Marwan squeezes his eyes shut against another wave of that strange sensation. Slowly, slowly, it gets better, and he can’t deny that Luca has a point. He’s half hard in his jeans, and when he locks eyes with Luca again, Luca’s brows rise.

“See? Everywhere.”

“Do you want to go back home for a moment before we go for _haring en biertjes_?”

“You mean—” Luca gives Marwan’s crotch a pointed look and wiggles his eyebrows. 

“What do you _think_ I mean?”

Carefully, Marwan tests his legs. They still prickle a little, but he’s able to move them again without his breathing getting stuck in his throat with the sheer agony of it. Wincing, he scrambles to his legs, brushes grass and sand from his jeans and holds his hand out for Luca to take.

Grinning, Luca grabs it and lets Marwan pull him up and into his arms.

“Gladly,” he smiles into Marwan’s soft kiss, and when he nods, his lips feel like the finest silk against Marwan’s.

“Come on, then,” Marwan says when he breaks the kiss and turns to pick up his bike. From the corner of his eyes he can see how a shadow falls over Luca’s face for a brief moment, but when Luca pushes his bike next to Marwan, the shadow is gone. 

“ _Andiamo_ ,” Luca says, grinning back over his shoulder, the cheerfulness in his voice just a little bit forced. Then he mounts his bike and kicks off.

Marwan shakes his head and smiles, heading after him. 

*****

It’s different this time; but then again, it’s different each and every time they do it. As soon as they’re through the door to the loft, Luca has Marwan shoved against the wall and his tongue down his throat. The passion with which he kisses him is breathtaking, both figuratively and literally. It’s long and deep and desperate and all-consuming, and Marwan doesn’t even know how long it lasts. It could be minutes, hours, days. When Luca finally breaks the kiss, Marwan’s ears are ringing with it, he’s dizzy and rock hard, rolling his hips against Luca’s without even realizing.

“I want you to fuck me,” Luca murmurs against Marwan’s throat, his words slurred with desire and his lips swollen with their kiss. “I want you to break me open and fuck me until—”

“Yeah,” Marwan moans when Luca bites down and sucks a dark mark into his skin. “Yeah, fuck, yeah—”

“Like they’ve just returned from a mission,” Luca bites along Marwan’s clavicle, his fingers clasped around the neckline of Marwan’s t-shirt, pulling it aside with so much force it almost tears. “Like they just died and came back to life. Fuck me like that.”

Marwan’s stomach lurches, and there’s that dull stabbing pain in his chest again, and he nods, his head bent backwards and his fingers in Luca’s hair. The moan that falls from his lips is raw and guttural, and Luca’s lips are so hot against his skin they’re leaving a burning trail. 

“As if it was the first time,” he moans, and for the blink of an eye Luca freezes. But then he crushes their mouths together again, licking, biting, clawing, and Marwan’s hips jerk and his cock twitches in his jeans, and he doesn’t know if he’ll be able to make this last very long. Luca’s tongue fucks into his mouth, his breathing ragged and his hands underneath Marwan’s shirt already, and inside his pants. 

“Like this,” Luca moans, closing his fingers around Marwan’s cock and trying to jerk it, but there’s not enough room, not really, yet it still feels so good Marwan almost comes right there and then. “Like this—”

Luca’s fingers withdraw and make quick work of Marwan’s belt and trousers, then of his own. Dragging Marwan down with him, he lowers himself to the floor, and Marwan follows, his cock hard and pulsing, and his desire for Luca increasing with every breath he takes. 

Cursing under his breath, Luca toes off his shoes and shimmies out of his pants, and again, Marwan follows suit. He pulls first Luca’s then his own t-shirt off and lets Luca pull him down on top of him.

They barely fit into that small space on top of the stairs, it’s just enough room for them to stretch out to their full lengths. When Luca opens his legs, Marwan slots between them, his cock already oozing pre-come, just like Luca’s. 

“Fuck me,” Luca moans, his hands in Marwan’s hair, as Marwan kisses, licks, bites his way down Luca’s throat and chest. Luca’s hips thrust upwards when Marwan reaches Luca’s lower belly and then his groin.

Grabbing hold of Luca’s cock with one hand and parting his ass cheeks with the other, crouching on his knees between Luca’s spread legs, Marwan closes his eyes for a moment. His own cock is throbbing with arousal, and his entire body is humming with need. He wants this so much it hurts. 

He leans forward and takes Luca into his mouth and pushes a finger into him at the same time. And even though his finger is dry, Luca opens up to him so beautifully it’s almost impossible to believe.

Luca arches into Marwan’s touch, Marwan’s fingers still wrapped around the base of Luca’s cock, trying to fuck Marwan’s mouth, but Marwan holds him down as good as he can.

“Fuck,” he moans around Luca’s cock when Luca’s body relaxes and when his muscles give Marwan even more access to his body. He withdraws and pushes two fingers inside, and Luca holds his breath for a moment. When he releases it again, his moan vibrates around Marwan’s fingers and in his mouth. 

It’s too much, it’s too much already, and Marwan has to touch himself now, so he lets go of Luca’s cock and takes himself in hand. Stroking himself, he sits up back on his heels, his eyes glued to his fingers buried in Luca’s body and to how beautifully Luca is letting him in. 

Marwan curls his fingers inside of Luca’s tight heat, and the sharp breath that Luca sucks in in reaction makes Marwan swell even more in his own grip. “Fuck,” he moans, watching Luca roll his hips, his head arched back, his Adam’s apple moving below his skin, and his hands above his head, clasped around the iron bars of the staircase in what looks like a death grip. He curls his fingers again, coaxing a throaty moan from Luca’s lungs, and Luca’s hips roll again.

It’s too much, seeing Luca fuck himself on his fingers is just too much, and Marwan has to do something about it now, he has to be inside of Luca right this fucking moment. For a second, he forgets where he is as he pulls out his fingers and grabs hold of his cock. He almost fucks into Luca just like that but at the back of his mind he knows he mustn’t. 

Cursing under his breath, he blindly reaches for his jeans and fishes a condom from his pocket, tears the package open with his teeth and rolls it over his aching cock. There is no lube, so he spits on his fingers, and that will have to do. His hand trembles as he spreads his saliva over Luca’s entrance, searching for Luca’s eyes, needing to make sure this is okay before—

Luca nods, and his eyes are burning with so much arousal Marwan’s heart misses a beat. Luca nods again, and Marwan spits into his palm this time, trying to get his erection at least a little coated, and then he positions himself, nudging at Luca’s entrance with the tip of his cock.

“Yeah,” Luca whispers and tightens his grip on the bars. “Like this—”

Luca is impossibly tight around Marwan, yet he takes him in gradually. “Like this,” he whispers. “Like this…”

It has to hurt, Marwan is sure of that, but maybe that’s what Luca wants. Maybe that’s what he needs right now, and when Luca tightens around Marwan and his back arches a little the concept of rationality ceases to exist.

Luca urges him on with moans and curses and touches and kisses and with the way his body curls underneath Marwan’s, and Marwan is fucking into Luca hard now, every thrust of his hips bringing him closer and closer to the edge. He tries to slow down, to make this last at least a little longer, but when he does Luca hooks his legs behind his back, and that’s it. 

He thinks of warning Luca, and he thinks that maybe he even does, maybe he even does let him know how close he is and that he’s going to come, that he’s going to come soon, and maybe Luca even tells him to, he can’t say for sure. He clings to what is left of him with everything he has, but when Luca’s legs drop from his back and Luca goes completely rigid underneath him, he’s lost. 

When the first spurt of Luca’s come touches Marwan’s overheated skin, his climax hits, and even though he’s been so close for so long, it takes him by complete surprise and it utterly overwhelms him. His hips stutter and his cock pulses and pulses inside of Luca’s trembling body and it feels as if it’s never going to stop. 

He doesn’t realize he’s still coming when he collapses on top of Luca, his throat sore with his heavy breathing. Luca has let go of the bars and is holding onto him now, Luca’s hands on the small of his back, increasing the intimacy of their joint release a hundredfold. 

When he comes to again his knees hurt and his fingers are covered in come; he must have reached between their bodies at some point to stroke Luca off, only he doesn’t remember. Luca’s lips are hot against his temple, open and wet and too out of it for a real kiss. 

“Fuck,” he moans when Luca tightens around him, his body teasing a last spurt of release from Marwan’s softening cock. He buries his face against the crook of Luca’s neck, Luca’s pulse rabbit fast beneath his sweat-covered skin. “I’m sorry. Did I hurt—”

“Like this,” Luca cuts him short, softly running his hand up and down Marwan’s back once, and then a second time. “Like this.”

Marwan nods, swallowing around the coppery ache in his throat, trying to bite his numb lips back to life. “We should get up,” he murmurs, his voice heavy with exertion. “The floor’s—”

“The floor is perfect,” Luca says after a short pause, and when Marwan slips from his body moments later, it’s accompanied by two quiet moans. “Okay,” Luca says, and when Marwan pushes himself up and struggles to his feet, again. “Okay.”

Marwan holds out his hand and helps Luca to his feet as well. Stretching his back, Luca winces.

“Shit,” Marwan says, turning Luca around and running his hand down his spine. “I shouldn’t have—”

Luca turns around, careful not to get caught up in their clothes cluttering the floor beneath his feet and places his finger on Marwan’s lips. He shakes his head. 

“Thank you,” he murmurs, brushing his thumb over Marwan’s lower lip, a small smile playing around his mouth. “Thank you for not asking.” He replaces his finger with his lips, and Marwan’s lips open when the tip of Luca’s tongue nudges against them. He lets Luca claim his mouth, lick into it, fuck it with his tongue until they have to break apart for air.

“Come on,” Marwan says and bows down to pick up his clothes. “Shower. Nap. Haring.”

“Sounds fantastic,” Luca replies, picking up his own clothes. He opens his mouth as if he wants to say something, but after just a moment, he closes it again, and Marwan thinks he can see a little shake of Luca’s head. As Luca walks down the stairs in front of him, Marwan lets his eyes roam Luca’s naked backside. His muscles are flexing underneath his skin, and he looks incredible like that. Marwan wants to tell him that, but somewhere deep inside of him a faint voice tells him not to, so he keeps quiet.


	6. Chapter 6

Marwan could spend hours in _Athenaeum_. He has, in fact; many, many times. Since he knows how easily he can lose himself in this heaven of a bookstore, he tells Luca to come find him and tell him when he’s done and ready to leave. He doesn’t know how much time has passed when he realizes that he’s probably been browsing the shelves for far longer than he should have. When he finds Luca nowhere inside, he returns to the checkout and checks his phone.

 _sitting outside_ , Luca’s message reads, and those two words make Marwan smile so brightly his face almost hurts. Looking up and through the glass entrance door out onto ‘t Spui, he sees Luca sitting on one of the benches on the square with his back to Marwan and his arms casually resting on the backrest, and his chest instantly expands with joy. Luca fits here; it’s almost as if he lived here, as if he belonged.

Smiling, Marwan makes his way outside and to where Luca is sitting. He can tell from the way Luca shifts his position that Luca is already aware of him approaching, so he simply walks up to him and places his hands on Luca’s shoulders. They’re warm, soaked with sunshine, and his muscles move subtly under Marwan’s hands. 

“Hey,” Marwan says quietly, stroking Luca’s neck with his thumbs. It feels good, Luca’s skin just covered by the thin fabric of his t-shirt. “ _Geniet je van de zon?_ ”

“Hm?” Luca tilts his head to the side, rubbing his cheek against Marwan’s hand. His face is warm, too, and his lips kiss sunlight onto the back of Marwan’s hand. “What’s with the sun?”

Marwan chuckles as Luca leans further into his touch. “The sun – you like it? You enjoy it?”

“Yeah,” Luca kisses Marwan’s hand again, this time with a little touch of the tip of his tongue, just the tiniest lick. “It feels good.” He straightens his neck again and stretches, his arms above his head. 

Smiling, Marwan leans down, and Luca captures his head in his hands, turning towards Marwan again and brushing his lips against Marwan’s in a fleeting kiss.

Marwan is glad that most people here either don’t know or, if they do, don’t care who he is. And Luca, too. The movie hasn’t been out long, it hasn’t spread that much yet, so people here don’t recognize Luca here yet. It’s easy, almost like being seventeen again and in love. 

“Herring?” Marwan whispers against Luca’s temple, and Luca nods, and Marwan points to their left, to a booth across the square. “Let’s go to that one this time.”

As announced, Luca has two herrings and, since he’s buying this time, so has Marwan, even though he had planned on eating only one. But when Luca turns and orders two more, trying to place his order in Dutch, he can’t refuse. 

After their snack, they walk over to _Café Hoppe_ for a beer, and when the waiter has brought their drinks Marwan pulls his phone from his back pocket. 

“Hey, so, when do you want to go to Antwerpen? To visit Matthias? Tomorrow? Or on Friday?“

Luca frowns around the rim of his glass, and he takes a long swig before he replies.

“Friday,” he says, and Marwan nods. “If that fits with Matthias and his plans.”

“Okay. Let’s find out then. I’ll text him.” Marwan does, and only a short moment later Matthias’s return message flashes up on the small screen of Marwan’s phone. 

“He’s looking forward to seeing you, he says.” Marwan smiles. “Me, not so much. And he wants me to tell you that the beer in Amsterdam is shit. He’ll show you what good beer is when we visit. On Friday. We can check for trains later. They usually go pretty often, but I’m not sure how frequent they’ll be now. Anyway, Matthias says he’s sorry you have to drink this for the time being.”

Luca grins and takes another sip from his glass.

“He’s not wrong, though,” Marwan says and raises his glass as well. “Belgian beer _is_ much better than this and—”

“Oi!” The waiter, who’s just walked past them with another customer’s order, cuts in with a mock glare on his face. “I guess that means you don’t want another round, then?”

Since Marwan has just taken a swallow from his glass, he holds up two fingers, and the waiter nods.

“So, eating out or leftovers at home today?”

Luca pauses. “We can still go to that place you mentioned another day if we stay at home tonight, right?”

Marwan nods. “Of course.”

“Then I want to stay home, I think,” Luca says. “I’m feeling a bit tired today. Too much fucking, I think.”

For a moment there, Marwan thinks Luca is serious about that, and his stomach drops, but after a short while of holding Marwan’s gaze with an unreadable expression on his face, Luca’s features burst into a beaming smile. 

“Just a joke. There is no such thing.”

“Thought so,” Marwan grins, even though that’s not true. “We can grab some stuff on the way and we can make a salad to go with the couscous, if you want.”

Luca nods and takes a little step back from their table when the waiter arrives with their second round of beers. When they’ve their fresh drinks, Luca raises his glass to Marwan.

“Before I leave, I cook something for you. Pasta. I make pasta for you.” He nods with such sweet determination that all Marwan can do is smile, despite the bitter taste the first part of Luca’s announcement has left on his tongue.

“I have a pasta maker,” Marwan says, and immediately, Luca’s nose wrinkles. “An automatic one.”

“You have a pasta maker," Luca raises his eyebrows and shakes his head. "Do you have a—a _mattarello_? How do you say it? A rolling pin?”

“I think so,” Marwan says, slowly. He really isn’t sure. “If not, we can get one. If that’s really what you old school guys use to make pasta.”

Luca snorts. “I’m not even going to comment on that. You do not hear much about the Dutch cuisine, do you?”

After they’ve finished their drinks, Marwan pays, and they make their way back to his loft. On their way there, they stop at a supermarket where they get salad and more wine as well as more fresh fruit for tomorrow’s breakfast. 

Luca helps make the salad, and Marwan reheats the leftovers from yesterday’s dinner in the oven. They eat at the dining table, and when they’ve finished their meal, Marwan clears away the dishes.

When Marwan returns to the table, Luca is still sitting there, watching how he moves his hand slowly across the table’s wooden surface.

Marwan’s thoughts immediately flash back to yesterday afternoon, of what went down _right there_ just after Luca had arrived. He can feel himself blush.

“Do you really think,” he says, and his words drag a little, and he pauses when Luca looks up and locks eyes with him, “do you really think we—that there’s too much fucking?”

“Yeah,” Luca says, his voice carrying a note of seriousness and concern. “Yeah, I think so. That’s why I think we shouldn’t fuck tonight.”

Marwan purses his lips, and then he bites them, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans. He’s still not sure what’s going on here, but something apparently is, and he doesn’t really understand it. Doesn’t want to, maybe.

“Yeah,” Luca nods. “I think we should do a _soixante-neuf_ tonight.”

Marwan literally does a double take. Sometimes, he forgets how good an actor Luca is, and one should never, _never ever_ forget that. He huffs, and then he bursts into laughter.

“I had you worried there for a bit,” Luca teases, looking endearingly smug about it, and rises from his chair. He walks around the table and leans back against it just like he did yesterday.

Marwan nods. Then he reaches for the front of Luca’s shirt and turns him around so that he himself can sit on the table’s edge. He opens his legs and pulls Luca between them. 

“Yeah, for a bit,” he smiles and lets his hand slide around Luca’s torso, up his spine and into his hair. “I want to kiss you,” he murmurs, their lips almost touching. “I want to taste you – everywhere.”

“Yes, please,” Luca replies, letting his tongue dart out and its tip quickly licking over Marwan’s upper lip. “I want that. I want that so much.”

“You would tell me, though, right?” Marwan asks before he nips at Luca’s lips. “You would tell me if I… if it were too much? If you were sore or bored or—”

“I have already told you,” Luca brings his mouth close to Marwan’s ear. He lowers his voice and says: “There is no such thing as too much fucking. And yes, I would. As would you.”

Marwan nods, and a shiver runs through him as Luca’s lips ghost over his skin, as they wander from his ear down his throat and then up again to his mouth. “I want to taste you,” he repeats, his voice laced with longing.

“Then start with my lips,” Luca whispers, and Marwan doesn’t need to be told twice. 

They kiss for what seems like hours this time, slow, lazy, open-mouthed kisses that only slowly grow into hungrier ones which are gradually filling with increasing need. Their cocks grow hard against each other, Luca still framed by Marwan’s legs; the build-up is steady, and they savor the tantalizing increase of arousal up to the point it becomes unbearable – and then just a little bit beyond that. 

While he’s letting his hands slowly slide underneath Luca’s t-shirt, savoring what he thinks may be the lingering warmth of the afternoon sun, it occurs to Marwan that this may very well be the first time he’s consciously undressed Luca, as opposed to all the other times when they had just been desperate to get out of their clothes as fast as possible if not faster. 

Luca feels so good against his palms, and soon his fingers are tingling, but he keeps his hands just there, underneath Luca’s shirt, roaming his body. Luca’s hands are resting on Marwan’s thighs, his thumbs gently stroking them, and those two small weights may very well be the only things that keep Marwan grounded. 

Without their knowing, their hips have begun to roll, slowly, very slowly, almost imperceptibly, and when Marwan’s fingers brush over Luca’s right nipple and Luca’s breathing hitches in response, they break apart and lock eyes. 

Luca nods, briefly biting his lips. When his features relax again after a short moment, Marwan can see how red and swollen Luca’s lips are from their kiss, and he can’t help it – he simply _has_ to reach out and touch them. Carefully, he runs his fingertips over them, and they’re so pliant it makes his head spin. Without him even knowing, his tongue darts out and licks his own lips, and tasting Luca again like this is the most powerful aphrodisiac he can imagine.

When Luca reaches for the hem of Marwan’s shirt and begins to lift it, Marwan raises his arms, giving Luca better access. First his own shirt comes off, then Luca’s, and then Luca’s fingers slowly undo Marwan’s belt and the buttons of his jeans.

Marwan’s hands return the favor, and soon they’re stepping out of their trousers and head for the bedroom, Luca one step ahead of Marwan, and Marwan’s hand in his. It takes them a while to get there, though, because every other step either one of them stops to pull the other in for more kisses, more touching, and the way Luca’s back and the curve of his ass feel just begs for more of all of that.

Luca is hard against Marwan’s own hardness, and every time Marwan can feel Luca’s cock twitch a bolt of desire sparks in his groin, sending its ripples through his entire nervous system. By the time they finally do reach the bedroom and sink down onto the mattress together, Luca pulling Marwan down with him, on top of him, still kissing, still touching, he’s leaking, and Luca’s just as aroused. 

“God, I’m so turned on,” Luca licks into Marwan’s mouth, emphasizing his words with rolling his hips against Marwan’s thigh. “Do you think—” When Marwan mirrors the movement, Luca’s question is interrupted by a hiss that turns into a moan when Marwan’s leg adds a little pressure to his groin. “Do you think they do it like this often? I mean, just—not fucking?”

Something inside of Marwan’s chest twists at Luca’s question, but he’s too aroused to pay much attention to it. 

“Yeah,” he nods, his hands cupping Luca’s head when Luca breaks their kiss and lets his lips wander down Marwan’s throat. “I—” Luca sucks at his pulse point, and Marwan’s breathing hitches. “I think, yeah, sometimes. Definitely sometimes.”

Luca nods and shifts so that Marwan rolls off him and kisses and bites his way down Marwan’s chest, stomach and then along the insides of his thighs. 

“Fuck,” Marwan moans, his hands still in Luca’s hair, and he wills Luca to move up again, to not pass his cock by like he just did, but to take him into his mouth and make the world around them disappear. He shifts, and Luca moves, too, until they’re lined up just the right way for Marwan to take Luca in his hand and for Luca to do the same to him.

Only Luca doesn’t. While Marwan wraps his fingers loosely around the base of Luca’s cock and lets the tip of his tongue circle around Luca’s crown, Luca doesn’t quite close the distance, but instead, he lets his fingertips travel down Marwan’s spine until they part his cheeks and, in a far too gentle caress, run over the entrance to his body. 

Marwan’s cock jerks, and his back arches of its own accord, and he curses under his breath when he can feel Luca exhale deliberately, the air streaming from his mouth weaving around Marwan’s cock like the finest, the lightest silk.

“Oh shit,” he moans, licking his lips. Luca’s cock is swelling in his grip, and when he licks around the crown again, he can taste the first drop of pre-come on his tongue. “Fuck, just—" He can feel himself thicken even more, and it almost feels as if he’s already coming, he’s that turned on. 

Luca chuckles.

“Fuck.” Marwan’s hips buck, and the tip of his cock almost, almost touches Luca’s lips, and if Luca doesn’t take him in his mouth now, Marwan will most definitely lose his mind. 

Then there is the smallest, the _lightest_ , the _most fleeting_ of touches to the tip of his cock, and the jolt of white hot arousal that shoots through Marwan’s body makes him see stars. He thinks he’s beyond caring by now if Luca finally has mercy on him, but the next light touch teaches him otherwise. 

“Fuck,” he moans, and when Luca’s middle finger presses against his hole just the smallest bit, all he can think of is how he wants to come down Luca’s throat and how he needs to be in Luca’s mouth right now. “Oh fuck, _please_ —You're killing me, _please_ —”

“Yeah,” Luca breathes, and this time Marwan is sure he’s going to die from this blinding desire no matter what. “But—slow…”

Luca somehow manages to grab hold of Marwan’s cock with his other hand, and when he runs his thumb over Marwan’s slit Marwan can feel exactly how wet he is, how much he wants and how desperately he needs this. His eyes close and his ears fill with white noise.

“Soon…”

Luca’s right, of course, and through the fog of lust blurring his mind, Marwan can hear himself moan in agreement. Or in protest, he can’t really be sure. He tries to will himself to relax, to breathe a little more evenly, to still the movements of his hips. It’s maybe the most difficult thing he’s ever done, but when his mind clears a little, when his need takes one small step backwards and away from the brink, he feels as if he’s floating. A breathless chuckle falls from his lips, and he can feel his eyes prickle. 

“Okay,” he whispers, and gives the length of Luca’s cock the softest, most gentle lick. As always, Luca tastes divine, and that first taste kindles Marwan’s hunger for more. He opens his mouth a little and brings the tip of Luca’s cock to his lips. Slowly, very slowly, he takes Luca into his mouth, and he can feel Luca mirror him, can feel himself sliding into Luca’s devilishly warm and wet mouth as if it were nothing, even though it is everything. His hips stutter, and Luca coughs a little around him, so he forces himself to still again. 

They slowly begin to suck each other off, soon both trembling with the effort to hold back, to make this last. They hang on to it as long as they can, but eventually they have to give in, and Marwan can’t tell who succumbs first. It becomes a spiral of faster and faster movements, accelerating heartbeats, ever-increasing desire until Marwan is fucking Luca’s mouth and Luca’s fucking his. Luca has breached his body, and now he has two fingers inside of him, and he’s fucking himself on them, just as helplessly as Luca is fucking himself on his. 

He can feel exactly when Luca passes the point of no return, and even though he probably won’t come for another two or three strokes it’s that realization that triggers Marwan’s own climax with heat pooling in his groin until it becomes unbearable. The first taste of Luca’s release on his tongue makes Marwan chase it, makes him spend himself in Luca’s mouth in long, blinding pulses of pure pleasure, and Luca’s lips are still warm around him when he stops coming and his cock begins to soften.

He can feel Luca’s heartbeat on his tongue, and Luca’s rapid breathing fills his ears. Luca’s fingers are inside of him still, but they remain there, warm and firm, just like his remain enclosed by Luca’s tight heat. The closeness of it is acutely poignant, and Marwan’s throat feels raw with it. 

After a while, Luca slowly withdraws his fingers, and his hand comes to rest on Marwan’s hip. Marwan’s cock slips from Luca’s mouth, and Luca places the softest kiss on its tip. Marwan can feel him smile.

When Luca shifts a little, his cock slips from Marwan’s mouth as well, and Marwan hums, licking his lips. They stay like that for a moment, eyes closed and heartbeats evening out. Just breathing together, feeling close.

“You have a very beautiful cock,” Luca says eventually, and the hoarseness of his voice resonates with the lingering hum of Marwan’s release. After another tender kiss, Luca moves until he’s face to face with Marwan. His features are glowing, and Marwan can feel the warmth they radiate on his own face. “And you taste so good…”

Their lips brush against each other, and their hands slowly caress each other’s sides. Because they’re too blissed out for real kisses, they just lick each other’s lips lazily until Marwan can feel how he begins to drift off.


	7. Chapter 7

The following day, Thursday, passes a blissfully beautiful summer day. They fuck three times before dinner.

The first time, they’re still in bed and still warm and languid with sleep, and it’s lazy and slow and mind-blowingly good. It lasts forever, and Luca whispers something in his ear that sounds like _Malta_.

The second time, Marwan fucks Luca in the shower against the wall, with the warm water falling down on them like summer rain, like both a relief and a reward after a successfully completed mission, Luca says.

The third time, they’re about to leave the loft for _Kantijl_ to have dinner. They’re outside already, in the hallway, and Marwan has just locked the door behind them. When he turns around, Luca’s right there, looking at him with wide eyes, worrying his lower lip between his teeth. That’s all it takes. The next moment they’re inside again, stumbling down the stairs with their hands already trying to open each other’s trousers and their lips almost unable to separate. They make it to the sofa, but just barely. One can never know how a mission goes, if they get to return home together, is what Luca says when he’s hovering over Marwan there, rolling a condom over his achingly hard cock. 

After dinner on _Kantijl’s_ sidewalk terrace Marwan drags Luca to the men’s room with him. “If you do that thing with your tongue again just one more time, I swear—” he has told him just moments before, staring at Luca’s mouth across the table, his cock already hard and throbbing. And, of course, Luca had to do it again, he just _had_ to. It’s quick and dirty; Luca panting into Marwan’s kiss before Marwan turns him around in the stall and shoves him against the wall, crowded into that narrow space and the need just overwhelmingly strong. 

Back at home, they share a glass of red wine in bed while Marwan reads to Luca from one of the books he’s currently reading, Luca’s head resting in his lap, and his fingers idly playing with Luca’s sun-kissed hair. 

When Luca yawns for the third time, Marwan closes the book and switches off the bedside lamp. He gathers Luca into his arms, and they trade gentle kisses until they fall asleep.

Friday’s breakfast is a bit of an hurried affair because they’re going to meet Matthias in Antwerpen for lunch and they have to leave for the station in time. 

It’s weird on the train, sitting across from Luca with both of them wearing masks. Luca’s eyes smile at him, he looks happy and relaxed, but all Marwan wants to do is rip that piece of cloth away and see what’s underneath. So that’s what he does as soon as they step outside the station at their destination, and he nearly forgets to take off his own mask when he pulls Luca in for a much needed kiss.

It’s just twenty minutes’ walk from the train station to _De Groote Witte Arend_ , the restaurant they’re going to meet at, and it takes them through the city center of Antwerp. Marwan’s hand is in Luca’s back pocket again, and Luca’s arm is slung around Marwan’s waist as they pass the _Rubenshuis_ , and Marwan points to their left.

“Matthias lives down there,” he says, and Luca’s eyes follow his fingers. “Just around the block.”

“We could have met _there_ ,” Luca half-asks, frowning. “If that’s where he lives.”

Marwan chuckles. “There’s something he has in store for you at the restaurant,” he says. “Something he wants you to try.”

“Sounds ominous,” Luca grins, and brushes his lips against Marwan’s cheek briefly. “I’m intrigued.”

“Yeah, yeah, you say that now,” Marwan replies and pulls Luca a little closer against him. “We’re going to talk again later.”

Entering _De Groote Witte Arend_ they let go of each other but on their way to the courtyard through the long archway Marwan can’t resist reaching out a little behind himself, and Luca’s fingers immediately find his so they enter the courtyard with their fingers loosely entwined. 

Matthias is already waiting for them, sunglasses, fedora and all. He looks up and bursts into a beaming grin the moment he sees them.

For a second or two there’s an awkward hesitation, but then Matthias pulls first Marwan and then Luca in for a long and firm hug.

“I’ve missed you,” he murmurs into Luca’s ear, and over Luca’s shoulder he locks eyes with Marwan. “You, not so much,” he grins, and Marwan chuckles, shaking his head.

“Yeah, me neither.”

They move to sit down, but Matthias pulls at Luca’s arm, dragging him with him to the other side of the table.

“No, no,” he grins, shaking his head at Marwan. “You have him all the time. _Today_ , he’s mine.”

Even though Marwan knows that Matthias is joking, or so he tells himself, there’s an unexpected wave of something akin to pain washing through him when Luca smiles at Matthias and sits down on the bench next to him. But then he looks at Marwan, and that off-feeling ebbs – only to come back full force just a blink of an eye later.

“So, young man,” Matthias says as he places his arm around Luca’s shoulders and pulls him close. “Are you in for a treat now!”

Marwan can feel how his nose wrinkles when Matthias opens the menu with his free hand and points something out to Luca. “This. You’re going to try _this_.” Then he looks at Marwan, his grin deepening. “You?”

“No way,” Marwan says, shaking his head vehemently. “No way I’m drinking that ever again.”

“What is it?” Luca asks, a hint of doubt in his voice.

“It’s cherry beer,” Marwan says, making a face. “It’s disgusting.”

“It’s _kriek_ ,” Matthias closes the menu and makes eye-contact with the waiter. “It’s made here, you’re going to try it, and you’re going to like it.”

“I _will_ try it,” Luca says with an endearingly resolved nod. “We like adventures, we Italians.”

“Yeah, you say that now,” Marwan murmurs again, snatching the menu from Matthias’s hands as the waiter approaches. “ _Een De Koninck, graag,_ ” he orders his beer, and his nose wrinkles again when Matthias orders a _kriek_ for Luca and one for himself.

When their drinks arrive a few minutes later, Marwan’s eyes are fixed on Luca’s face. He wants to observe Luca’s reaction to the fruit beer as closely as possible.

Luca raises his glass, but before he samples the drink he inhales deeply, closing his eyes. “Hm,” he huffs, and his brows furrow a little as he brings it to his lips. He takes a small sip, and Marwan can see how Luca’s tongue moves around it in his mouth, testing, tasting. 

Luca smacks his lips and then he licks them a little before he takes another sip, a slightly larger one this time. His features soften, and before he sets his glass down there’s a smile on his face, and when his eyelids flutter open, the same smile is in his eyes.

Marwan’s stomach lurches, and he raises his glass quickly, taking a deep swig. When he sets his glass down again, Matthias’s gaze is resting on his face, and a cryptic smile plays around Matthias’s lips.

“This is _genius_ ,” Luca declares, turning the glass around in his hands a little before he takes another sip. “This _has_ to be one of the best things I ever tasted.”

The smug grin on Matthias’s face makes Marwan laugh, and watching Luca enjoying his drink makes him smile.

Over lunch, they update each other on what has happened since they last talked, and once they’ve finished their food, Matthias suggests they go to his place for coffee and drinks. So, after he has paid, they walk the short distance to Matthias’s apartment. It’s on the sixth and seventh floor, and it has a rooftop terrace where Matthias leads them before he disappears inside again to make coffee and fix drinks.

Luca walks up to the railing and lets his eyes roam over the city of Antwerp. At first, he looks a little tense but then his shoulders sag, and he tilts his head a little.

Smiling, Marwan steps up behind him and rests his hands on Luca’s hips. He nuzzles at the nape of Luca’s neck and hums. “You smell good,” he says, wrapping his arms around Luca’s waist. “You always smell so good…”

Luca tilts his head a little more to give Marwan better access to his throat, and Marwan doesn’t have to be told twice. His lips brush over Luca’s soft skin and he nibbles at Luca’s throat, letting his tongue run over Luca’s pulse point and behind his ear. He catches the lobe between his teeth, and the tip of his tongue darts out to give it the lightest touch. Luca shivers and leans his head back a little to catch Marwan’s lips in a slow, tender kiss.

“You taste like cherries,” Marwan whispers when they break for air, and Luca chuckles. 

“Yeah, I do.”

Marwan rests his chin on Luca’s shoulder while he shows him the _Rubenshuis_ from up here, and _De Groote Witte Arend_ , and from the corners of his eyes he watches Luca smile.

After a while there’s a sound behind their backs, and when they turn around, Matthias has brought a tray with small coffee cups and a _caffettiera_ , various glasses, a bottle of water, one of white wine and one of schnaps of some sort, candies, potato crisps, and an ashtray. 

He rolls a joint for them while they sip on their coffees and offers them drinks. Both Marwan and Luca opt for water and wine, and Matthias joins them. He lights the joint, and they pass it around between them, continuing their conversation they had over lunch. 

When the joint begins to take effect everything becomes funnier by the minute, and soon tears of laughter are streaming down Luca’s face, and that has to be one of the most endearing things Marwan has ever seen. He wraps his fingers around his glass to keep his hand from simply grabbing Luca’s face and his lips from kissing those tears away. 

Still completely in stitches over something Matthias has just said, Luca rises and asks for the bathroom a couple of minutes later, and as he walks inside Marwan falls silent and his giggles stop. He watches Luca leave, and his stomach lurches at the thought of how lovely it’s going to be to see him return here in just a few minutes. He can feel his face light up with a smile, and when he turns around again Matthias is watching him once more.

Matthias hands him the joint, narrowing his eyes a little, and after Marwan has taken a drag, Matthias takes it from Marwan’s hand again and brings it to his own lips. 

Marwan holds his breath for a moment before he exhales, and so does Matthias, still watching him closely.

“You’ve got it bad, don’t you?” Matthias says, and Marwan is only able to hold his gaze for another second or so before he has to avert his eyes.

“I don’t know what you—” he tries to deflect, but then he cuts himself short and bites his lips. When he looks up again Matthias’s eyes are still on him, and the look in them is so kind, so gentle Marwan’s chest constricts. “Don’t—” Marwan bites his lips again, but after a short pause he tries again. “Don’t say anything. To him, I mean.”

Matthias scoffs and takes a last drag from the joint before he puts it out. “Talk to him, man. Communication, you know. It’s key.”

“Nah,” Marwan shakes his head, glancing over his shoulder, but Luca’s still inside. “Nah, I don’t—” He clears his throat and runs his fingers through his hair. “We’re not— _He_ isn’t. He’s not into that, and I don’t want to fuck up what we have.”

“What do you have, then?”

“This,” Marwan replies after another short pause, even though he doesn’t really know what _this_ is. “We have _this_. We—” His voice breaks a little, so he clears his throat again. Fucking dope. “We fuck. Have fun together. It’s good. It’s the best sex I’ve had in ages, if not ever. It’s good like this, what we have. And I don’t want to—We have three more days,” he adds after a short pause. “Maybe four.” He runs his fingers through his hair again. He can’t believe that this is happening. To him. And that Matthias knows. “Shit, am I really that obvious?” He asks, shaking his head at himself. “Must be the joint. I mean—”

“You, my friend,” Matthias cuts in, his smile both reassuring and a little sad. “You’re in so far over your head you would have been that obvious if I had given you fucking _oregano_.”

When Luca returns, they’ve changed the subject and are arguing over football, and even though Luca has missed the first part of that conversation, he joins in immediately. It doesn’t take long for them to be kicking a ball back and forth on Matthias’s rooftop terrace, trying to show off their best dribbling tricks and failing miserably. 

They say their goodbyes around 6 pm and exchange promises to meet again as soon as possible. If everything goes well they’ll all be filming again soon, scattered across the world in different locations. Thinking about how this might be the last time in a very long while the three of them are together again makes Marwan’s throat hurt and his eyes almost tear up. Fucking dope, indeed.

On the train back to Amsterdam they’re giggling again, and once they’ve reached their destination Marwan suggests they grab a bite to eat and then head for one of his favorite bars, the _Café Chris_ in de Jordaan, the part of Amsterdam’s city center west of the Prinsengracht, and one of Marwan’s favorite parts of town. 

It’s possible again to go to bars without making a reservation in advance if the bar’s not too full, and they’re lucky to find it only a little frequented. They order their beers and chat with the bartender for a while, Rob, while he draws their beers. Careful not to spill anything they take their glasses outside with them to the low stools at the side entrance. It’s still warm enough to sit outside in just their t-shirts, and the beer is cool and the glasses soon become a little slippery in their hands, so they set them down on the cardboard coasters arranged in a circle on an empty stool standing in for a table.

Inside, the music changes, and it’s an Italian pop song that comes on.

Luca’s eyes widen, and he straightens his back. “I can’t believe they’re playing _that_ ,” he chuckles. “It’s from the eighties. I haven’t heard that one in _years_.”

“Yeah,” Marwan grins, taking a sip from his beer. “Rob’s the best. He listens when you talk to him. He’s a music freak, too. That helps.”

“It is so beautiful here,” Luca muses, letting his eyes roam the lamplit street. “How is that even possible?”

Marwan’s eyes study Luca’s face again, and he shakes his head in wonder. 

“I don’t know,” he says and watches Luca nod slowly. 

“I like it here,” Luca says after a while, and Marwan nods again. 

“Yeah, me too,” he mumbles around the rim of his glass when his stomach lurches again. Fucking _dope_.


	8. Chapter 8

“When we’re upstairs,” Luca murmurs into Marwan’s ear when Marwan is locking up his bike, “I want you to fuck me from behind. Hard and fast. It is sometimes like that, rough, yes? Don’t you think?”

When Marwan turns around, Luca winks at him suggestively and makes a show of walking across the street and up the stairs to the loft’s door in front of him. Marwan’s own ideas for the night have run more along the lines of gentle and slow, but if this is what Luca wants, then this is the way they’ll do it. Plus, Luca’s ass looks incredibly tempting in those jeans, and even more so once he’s taken them off and is on all fours on the bed, offering himself to Marwan in a way Marwan would never have dreamed of.

He runs his hands up and down Luca’s back and sides, up and down the outsides of his thighs and the insides as well. He reaches between Luca’s legs and finds his cock hard against his stomach, ready to be stroked, so this is what he does. 

The lube and the condoms are lying on the covers next to him, so he won’t have to search for them later, and they’re both fully naked and fully aroused. 

Marwan’s fingers part Luca’s cheeks and he gently runs them over Luca’s entrance a couple of times before he stills.

“Ready?” he asks, and he can feel Luca’s cock swell against his palm.

“Yeah,” Luca rasps, taking a long breath and releasing it again. “Ready.”

Marwan nods and bites his lips as he breaches Luca’s body with two fingers, pushing past that tight ring of muscle _hard_ , drawing a pained moan from Luca’s lips. He nudges against the rim of Luca’s hole with his thumb as he pushes in further, and Luca’s muscles clench around his fingers so hard it almost hurts.

“Fuck,” Marwan moans, and his cock swells even more. His eyes are glued to where his fingers are inside, but he can feel how a drop of pre-come begins to form at his slit. The sounds Luca makes as he pushes back, as he fucks himself on Marwan’s fingers are not from this world. They tear at Marwan’s mind and tug at his stomach in a way he’s entirely unfamiliar with. 

Luca is tight and hot, and after another couple of times of pushing into him with his fingers, both Marwan and Luca are ready for more.

Marwan’s fingers are trembling as he withdraws and tears open the condom’s wrapping. Rolling it over his cock is excruciating, he can feel his orgasm already beginning to build deep inside him, and from the way Luca’s breathing sounds, he can only assume that Luca isn’t far behind. 

“Hold yourself open for me,” he rasps as he reaches for the lube and coats himself. It takes Luca just the tiniest moment of hesitation to comply. 

Luca lowers his upper body onto the mattress and his fingers grab hold of his cheeks and he pulls them apart a little, spreading them, exposing himself so beautifully it makes Marwan dizzy with want. 

“Fuck,” he hisses, stroking himself slowly, tilting his head. He can’t tear his eyes away from that small pink patch of skin. “You’re so fucking beautiful like this.”

Luca moans low in his throat, and Marwan watches how Luca’s muscles contract and relax again, and that’s when Marwan knows Luca’s ready. 

He scoots forward a little and positions himself, nudging at Luca’s entrance with the tip of his cock for a moment before he pushes forward. He breaches Luca’s body and enters his tight heat with one single gradual thrust until he bottoms out. Holding himself still for a moment, he lets Luca adjust a little before he pulls out again almost entirely and thrusts back in.

For as long as possible he tries to keep his movements like that, determined and rough, his fingers digging into Luca’s hips, until Luca’s breathing hitches with every thrust Marwan makes. This time, he pulls out entirely, the tip of his cock trembling against Luca’s hole, and he moans.

“Oh, fuck—”

He grips Luca’s hips harder and shifts a little before he pushes forward again. Once he’s fully sheathed, he leans forward, reaching for Luca’s shoulder with his right hand, pushing even further inside. 

“Fuck,” Luca moans when Marwan stills again, and he pushes back until Marwan is in so deep he thinks he’s going to choke with the sheer pleasure of it. His hips stutter and he withdraws and slams back into Luca hard, again and again, until he thinks he can’t take it any longer, not for one second, and Luca’s still begging for more. After a final thrust Marwan pulls Luca up, against his chest, and sits back onto his heels, one hand around Luca’s cock and the other one on Luca’s chest, holding him close against his own.

They’re both panting, and Luca’s skin against Marwan’s is like fire, like lightning, and for a moment, time seems to stand still.

Marwan’s cock throbs inside of Luca’s body, and Luca is so tight around him, he has taken him in so deep it takes Marwan’s breath away. 

Luca tries to move, but Marwan shakes his head. He gives Luca’s cock another stroke and then he stills his hand. 

Luca’s head rolls back when Marwan’s hand moves upwards to Luca’s throat, and it comes to rest against Marwan’s shoulder, and Marwan keeps his hands right there, on Luca’s cock and on Luca’s throat, two light touches that cause Marwan’s chest to tighten with want. 

“Are you close?” Marwan whispers, and Luca nods. He’s so close himself that it almost feels as if he’s coming already. “Do you want to come?”

“Yeah,” Luca moans and the vibration of that one word against Marwan’s palm sends increasing waves of arousal through Marwan’s entire body, and he can feel how the pleasure and the desire inside of him begin to crest. His hips jerk upwards, and he gives Luca’s cock a quick, firm stroke, and Luca’s body responds so beautifully it hurts.

Marwan throws his head back and moans while his hips begin to move of their own accord, and he fucks into Luca’s body with erratic thrusts, incapable of any kind of finesse. Luca’s rock hard in Marwan’s hand, and Marwan can feel him panting and moaning not only against his palm, but everywhere.

The sensation of the first spurt of Luca’s cock, the first touch of come to his fingers sets Marwan’s climax off as well, and with a short, raw moan he empties himself into Luca’s tight heat. 

Maybe he’s still coming when they collapse onto their sides, Marwan still buried deep inside, and Luca still burning against his chest. Marwan grabs Luca’s hair and pulls his head back, capturing Luca’s mouth for a sloppy, open-mouthed kiss.

They fall asleep like that, just for a moment, Marwan’s cock still inside of Luca, his hand still wrapped around Luca’s cock and his fingers in Luca’s hair. When they wake up a short while later, Marwan has slipped from Luca’s body, but everything else is still the same.

They carefully disentangle, Marwan pulls off the condom, and they head for the shower together to clean themselves up before they climb back into bed and pull the covers over them.

The next morning, Marwan is awake before Luca wakes up. He props himself up on one elbow and watches how the rays of sunlight dance over Luca’s body and face. The covers have slipped down, and only the lower part of Luca’s body is covered now. Marwan traces the thin dark line of hair running from below Luca’s navel to the hem of the covers with his eyes, and he almost reaches out to let his fingers follow, but then Luca’s eyes flutter open, and Marwan’s world comes to a halt.

Luca smiles.

“Good morning.”

“Good morning, _hayati_ ,” Marwan smiles back, leaning forward to place a gentle kiss on Luca’s sleep-soft lips. “How about a shower and then some breakfast?”

“Hmmm, breakfast,” Luca hums, kissing Marwan back. “What was what you said after good morning? To me?”

 _Shit._ Marwan closes his eyes and wills himself not to shake his head. “Nothing,” he says and opens his eyes again. “So, breakfast?”

He tries to sit up, but Luca grabs hold of his arm and holds him back. “No, wait. I want to know. What you said. What it means what you said.”

“Nothing,” Marwan says again, trying to free himself from Luca’s hold, but Luca’s hold just tightens a little. “It means nothing.”

“Tell me. I want to make sure you're not calling me an asshole or something…”

Marwan takes a deep breath and swallows around a lump in his throat. He forces himself to maintain eye-contact for a little longer, but then he has to look away.

“ _Ya hayati._ It means ‘my life’.”

There’s a short pause after that, and then Luca’s fingers touch Marwan’s jaw. Luca touches him so very, very lightly and with a tenderness so heartbreaking Marwan’s throat constricts. He looks up. Luca’s eyes are shining with something that is not sunlight. 

“Marwan, I—”

“Yeah, I know,” Marwan quickly interrupts. He doesn’t want to hear it. He can’t. “I know. Forget about it. It's nothing. Just—Just something that slipped past my lips; I’m probably still half asleep anyway, sorry... So, how about a shower and then some breakfast, asshole?”

Marwan tries to sit up again, and this time Luca doesn’t hold him back. He scrambles out of bed, and when he looks back at Luca from the door, Luca’s covering his eyes with one arm and he’s biting his lips. Once he’s in the bathroom, Marwan digs the heels of his hands into his eye sockets. His heartbeat’s way too fast and his throat hurts with swallowed words. He can only hope that he hasn’t fucked this up beyond repair. They’ve just two more days, maybe three. 

It takes Luca a couple of minutes to join Marwan in the bathroom, and when he does Marwan is in the shower. Luca steps inside, walks up to Marwan, turns him around and goes to his knees. Then he takes Marwan’s cock into his mouth and sucks him off. It’s slow and sweet and almost painfully intimate, Marwan’s fingers in Luca’s wet hair and Luca’s mouth so warm and his lips so beautiful and pliant.

When Luca looks up, he blinks against the shower’s spray, his skin glittering with diamond drops of water. Marwan cups Luca’s face, strokes over his cheekbone with his thumbs, but when he gets close, he closes his eyes. He lets his orgasm wash through him, spilling himself into Luca’s mouth, savoring the sensation of Luca swallowing his release, and, after that, of Luca licking him clean.

When he’s finished, Luca rises to his feet again, and Marwan strokes him off between their bodies. It doesn’t take long until Luca comes as well. 

After their shower, they dry each other off, and Luca asks Marwan to shave him. Towel slung around his hips, he retrieves his shaving kit from his bag in the bedroom and hands it to Marwan.

There’s a single blade razor in there, one that folds for travel, and a bar of shaving soap and a brush.

Marwan’s eyes dart back between the kit in his hands and Luca’s face, and when Luca starts to grin, all Marwan can do is grin back. He takes the shaving soap out and holds it under his nose to smell its scent before he puts the kit down next to the sink.

“Hop up there,” he motions to the washing table. Once Luca’s seated, Marwan reaches out and lightly runs his fingers over Luca’s throat, chin, jaws, cheeks and upper lip. Then he takes his shaving bowl from one of the cupboards and fills it with cold water.

It takes him some time to work up a good lather, but he takes this time happily, feeling Luca’s eyes and smile on him constantly. When he brings the brush to Luca’s face, Luca tries to dim down his smile, and after a couple of attempts he almost succeeds. 

Marwan thoroughly covers Luca’s stubble with lather, and when he comes to his right cheek, he pauses. One fingertip to the mole, he frowns for a moment, but then he nods. Leaving his finger right where it is, he lathers around it, and he can feel Luca grin.

“You can shave over it,” Luca says, trying not to move his facial muscles too much. “You just have to be very careful.”

“Okay,” Marwan says and takes a step backwards to look at Luca’s face. “Santa Claus.”

This time, Luca’s unable to suppress his grin, and Marwan shakes his head in a mock scold. “None of that anymore now.” He unfolds the razor and narrows his eyes. When he takes a step closer again, Luca opens his legs, and Marwan moves between them. “I’ve never done this,” he says, “for someone else.”

Luca nods. “And I’ve never had anyone do this for me,” he says.

As soon as the razor blade touches Luca’s skin, there’s a shift in the atmosphere. The world zeroes in on this – the blade in Marwan’s hand and Luca’s skin. Marwan works methodically and as calmly and steadily as he can, and Luca cooperates so very beautifully, tilting his head whenever Marwan needs better access, holding completely still when the blade moves against his skin.

Again and again, Marwan cleans the blade and checks the result of his work with a light touch of his fingers. His hand shakes a little when he gets to the throat, but after he’s taken a deep, calming breath, it’s steady again and he can set to work there. 

When he’s done, he sets the razor aside and fishes a fresh towel from the shelf over Luca’s left shoulder. He slings it over his shoulder and turns on the faucet, getting his hands wet under the water. When he touches Luca’s face with his wet hands, Luca’s skin feels so soft it makes Marwan’s jaws clench. 

The towel wipes the remaining lather away from Luca’s face, and when he’s finished drying Luca’s skin, Luca takes the towel from Marwan’s hands and runs it over his face a couple of times before he lets it drop onto the washing table next to him.

“ _Grazie_ ,” he beams, pulling Marwan in for a quick kiss. 

Marwan picks up the shaving kit to look for aftershave, but there is none. He raises his head and looks at Luca questioningly.

“There’s some in my bag,” Luca says, and when he wiggles a bit where he’s sitting, Marwan can see that he’s hard under the towel. “But I want to use some of yours.”

This is when Marwan becomes conscious of the intense arousal vibrating through his own body for the first time since they’ve started this. He’s pulsing with it, and his cock is hard and throbbing between his legs, tenting his towel as well. He swallows hard and nods. Grabbing the bottle from another shelf, he bites his lips. He can’t believe that he hasn’t noticed before how turned on he’s been the entire time, even though Luca has just sucked him off in the shower. Pouring some of the aftershave into his palm, he shakes his head, and a breathless chuckle falls from his lips. “Incredible,” he murmurs, then he rubs his hands together and brings them to Luca’s face.

Luca winces a little at the first contact, but then he closes his eyes and lets Marwan’s hands do their job. Luca’s eyes remain closed for a moment longer, and Marwan leans forward to place a light kiss on that freshly shaven cheek.

“There,” he says, taking a step backwards. “All done.”

Luca’s face bursts into another one of those smiles, and his eyes flutter open. 

“ _Grazie_ ,” he says again and slides off the counter. “Today, I make you pasta.”

Chuckling, Marwan watches Luca leave the bathroom and take off the towel around his hips just in time for Marwan to catch a glance at his naked backside. Marwan shakes his head at the look he knows is on Luca’s face right now even when he can’t see it. 

Shopping takes almost the entire first half of their day, but Luca manages to find a rolling pin, a ‘proper’ one as he calls it, and they buy one of those small, metal pasta machines that you have to operate by hand, which Luca claims is far superior to the electric one Marwan has. And, of course, bags and bags of ingredients.

“First, we make the dough,” Luca declares once they’re back in Marwan’s loft. He sets the three bags he’s carrying down onto the breakfast table and takes the things out that need to be stored in the fridge. “It needs to rest. To settle. Do you have an apron?”

Marwan does, and Luca dons it, and after having tied it behind his back, he runs his fingers through his hair. 

“Okay. The dough. Let’s go!”

From that moment on, Marwan is Luca’s assistant.

“The first rule of making pasta,” Luca instructs him, “is you have to sing when you make the dough.”

“Sing?”

“ _Si_ ,” Luca nods. “It’s the rule. We have to.”

So, they sing, and once again, Marwan is mesmerized by how beautiful Luca’s voice is not only when he speaks. How beautiful Luca is, period.

They make an enormous amount of dough, or at least that’s what it seems like to Marwan. When it’s done, Luca puts it in the fridge to ‘rest’. He wipes his hands, places them on his hips and purses his lips. “Now, the fillings. And the _sugo_. We’re making _tagliatelle_ , _ravioli_ and _tortellini_ , so we need—”

Marwan can’t help but stare at Luca while he’s speaking, and all he can think about is how he wants to taste him everywhere. It’s one of those brain freeze moments, when desire goes directly to the tongue, bypassing all thought and reason, so he cuts Luca short by blurting out what’s on the tip of his tongue. It’s what he wants most right now, it’s all he can think of.

“I want to eat you out.”

Luca freezes mid-movement, mid-sentence, and his eyes go wide. He closes his mouth and then he opens it again to speak, but at first there are no words. Then, there’s one.

“Now?”

Marwan is already so hard it hurts, and it’s all he can think about, so he nods. 

As if in slow motion, Luca takes the dish towel from where it’s slung over his shoulder and places it on the kitchen counter. Then he unties his apron, takes it off and places it on top of the towel. After that, he locks eyes with Marwan again.

“Okay.”

“Okay,” Marwan echoes and follows Luca to the bedroom, where they undress. Once they’re naked, Luca gives Marwan a gentle shove onto the bed and grins. 

“Give me a minute, I’ll be right back.”

Marwan can hear how the shower is turned on in the bathroom a few seconds later, and the thought of Luca under the warm spray coaxes his hand to grab hold of his cock. He starts stroking himself slowly, more a caress than a tease, and when Luca returns to the bedroom, a few drops of water still glistening on his shoulders, he stills his movements.

“Come here,” he says, and even _he_ can hear how much his voice is dripping with desire. “Like this.” He maneuvers Luca onto his stomach, and Luca rests his head on his arms. Marwan nudges at Luca’s leg before he brings his left knee between them. “Spread them a little, so I can—”

Luca complies beautifully, and when Marwan kneels between Luca’s legs and spreads his ass cheeks, he’s almost overwhelmed by his arousal. Luca’s really going to let him do this, and that prospect almost takes his breath away. He scoots down until he’s lying on his stomach as well, and then up a little again, ready to touch and to taste.

He runs his thumb at Luca’s entrance, gently nudging against it, and then he withdraws his hand and takes his index and his middle finger into his mouth, coating them with saliva.

Luca’s muscles contract when Marwan touches him again, and Luca moans low in his throat. For a short while, Marwan teases Luca’s hole with his fingers, and Luca seems to like that a lot. Then he spreads Luca’s cheeks a little further and lets the tip of his tongue dart out. The moment it touches Luca’s skin, it feels like a bolt of electricity shooting through both their bodies, sparking there at that small place of contact. 

“Fuck,” Luca moans, and his words are muffled because he’s pressing his face against his arms. “It must have been just like this…”

Marwan nods, running the tip of his tongue over Luca’s hole, quickly, lightly, before he pauses again and pushes against the tight muscles. He doesn’t breach Luca’s body yet, he wants to play with him a little first, to tease him until he’s shaking with need. And that’s exactly what he does; he licks and nudges, and he brings his fingers into this as well, stroking, nudging, licking around them, until he’s rolling his hips, rubbing his cock against the sheets. The only reason Luca isn’t doing the same is because Marwan is holding him down.

Luca’s head snaps up, and he draws in a sharp breath when Marwan’s tongue finally does push inside. The way Luca’s body reacts to this, the way Luca reacts to him, is sublime. A wave of arousal washes through Marwan so intense it makes him moan, and Luca joins in, and Marwan thinks this may be the best thing he’s ever done.

Marwan continues licking Luca and pushing his tongue inside again and again, and by then Luca’s fucking into the mattress as well with agonizingly shallow thrusts. 

Luca is fisting into the sheets, his moans and curses muffled by cloth, and the next second Marwan is coming. His climax takes him by complete surprise, his cock spurting into the sheets and his body swept away by burning waves of release.

Luca tenses a moment later, and Marwan can feel how he’s coming as well, he can feel the contraction of Luca’s muscles on his tongue, and for a second, he sees stars.

“Fuck,” Luca murmurs into the pillows, and when he turns his head to the side, his voice is still slurred with pleasure. “Fuck, that was—wow, just…wow.”

Marwan nods, his head resting on the back of Luca’s thigh and his fingers still between Luca’s cheeks. His cock is pulsing with residual climax, and his lips taste of Luca when he licks over them. 

“You can say that, yeah,” he murmurs, then he places a gentle kiss on the endearingly curved crease where Luca’s leg meets his ass. “Thank you for letting me have this.”

“Are you crazy?” Luca shifts, turns and sits up, pulling Marwan up with him. “You must be crazy,” he says, brushing his lips over Marwan’s. “That was amazing. Thank _you_.”

Marwan kisses him back, how can he not, and together they fall into the pillows, lips and legs entwined.

“Do we have a moment?” Marwan asks into their kiss. “Or do we have to make the fillings right now?”

“We have a moment,” Luca replies, smiling. “The dough will keep. Let’s just—Let’s just stay here for a little while.”

They take an hour to come down and hold each other, just light caresses and soft kisses, and when they rise again and get dressed, Marwan feels he’s constantly smiling. When he looks at Luca, he sees the same.

They make spinach and ricotta stuffed ravioli and veal tortellini, which Luca feeds to Marwan raw to taste, “just try it, it’s so good…”, and it has to be one of the best things he’s ever eaten. That list seems to be getting longer and longer with every minute Luca’s here. They also make tagliatelle with an heirloom tomato sauce with insane amounts of basil in it, a light creamy broth for the tortellini, and, later, just before they eat them, a simple butter sauce for the ravioli. When they’re done making the pasta, Marwan’s kitchen and dining area are covered in flour, and so is Luca – and by the amused look in Luca’s eyes, so is Marwan. They clean up a little, and then they sit down to eat.

Everything tastes divine, including the bottle of wine they share over their food.

After dinner, Marwan clears the table, and when he comes back, Luca’s on his laptop, brows furrowed and his lower lip between his teeth.

“What are you looking for?” Marwan asks because it’s clear Luca’s searching for something. 

“Return flights for tomorrow,” Luca says, not looking up from the laptop’s screen. 

Marwan’s stomach drops. He had thought they were having a good time, fun. But apparently—

“Tomorrow is Tuesday already,” Luca says and finally lifts his gaze. The look in his eyes is unreadable. “There’s the _Eden_ junket I have to prepare for; and they’ll launch the teaser for _Diabolik_ in autumn, so… I have to go back eventually.”

Marwan nods. Luca’s a big deal in his country, and he’s going to be one all around the world. That’s what Marwan wants to tell him, that he understands and that Luca’s going to be a star. _You’re going to be a star_ , that’s what he wants to say. _You go and do that._ He opens his mouth, but he has to clear his throat before he can speak, and even then, his voice sounds hoarse.

“Of course,” he says. “I know. I understand. Let me know when your flight’s going to be, and I’ll take you to the station.”


	9. Chapter 9

The flight Luca has booked is an evening flight, so they spend their last day cycling and walking through Amsterdam one last time. This time, Marwan takes Luca to the Westelijke Eilanden, the Western Docklands, and to Amsterdam Noord, the part of town that has become really trendy over the last couple of years and where a quite lot of his friends have moved to. It’s another beautiful summer day, so they have lunch outside, and a glass of beer, too.

Back at the loft, Luca packs his things and places the key to his bike lock on the dining table before they leave. Marwan can’t bear to look at it, so he doesn’t.

They’re mostly silent on the tram ride to the station, sitting next to each other, Luca’s hands folded in his lap. Luca’s bag is on the floor between their feet, and Luca’s looking out of the window again, just like he did only a couple of days ago when they were riding the tram home from the station.

 _Home_. Marwan barely suppresses a scoff. He can already see that bike lock key lying there on the table, waiting for him when he gets back.

Outside the Centraal Station they stop and stand facing each other without saying a word. Marwan kicks the pavement with the tip of his shoe, his hands shoved into his pockets, and when he looks up again, Luca shrugs and shakes his head.

“I have to go,” he says, and his voice sounds off somehow, but maybe that’s just what Marwan wants to hear. “I—I had a really good time. The best time really. Thank you. Thank you. _Grazie._ ”

Marwan nods, and when Luca tries a small smile, he’s had enough.

“Come here,” he says and pulls Luca into his arms. “Thank you for having come here.”

Luca’s bag falls to the floor and his arms wrap around Marwan’s torso. Luca nods against his shoulder and mumbles something Marwan can’t make out. For a moment, Luca’s embrace tightens. 

“Don’t go,” Marwan whispers, his lips so close to Luca’s ear he could lick it. The words are out of Marwan’s mouth before he knows it, and once they are, Luca freezes. “Don’t go. Stay. Don’t go today. Please. Just one more night. Just us.”

This time, Marwan can hear what Luca’s saying. “What?”

Marwan breaks the embrace a little and pushes against Luca’s shoulders a bit so he can look at him, look at his face and into his eyes. “Don’t go. Don’t go just yet. Stay just one more night. No Joe and Nicky. Just us.”

Luca’s eyes widen, and they’re filled with questions and surprise. “I—” Luca starts, but he interrupts himself and licks his lips. “I didn’t think that was an option.”

Now it’s Marwan’s turn to be stupefied. “What?”

“I didn’t think that would be something you would want.”

It takes a while for Luca’s words to register, and when they do, Marwan finds himself staring into Luca’s eyes, his heart beating almost out of his chest. “That’s why you—”

Luca nods.

This is when Marwan’s brain short-circuits, and he crushes his mouth to Luca’s in a kiss so blinding it makes his head spin. He doesn’t care where they are or who can see them, all he cares about is this, about Luca kissing him back with everything he has.

“Of course I want that,” he whispers against Luca’s lips when they have to come up for breath. “Of course I want _you_. Come home with me, stay the night.”

“Okay,” Luca croaks after another deep and hungry kiss. “Okay. Yes.”

“There’s so much pasta left,” Marwan smiles back. “I can’t eat all of that by myself.”

“No, I guess you can’t,” Luca says, and Marwan bends down to pick up Luca’s bag.

This time, they hold hands on the tram again and smile at each other whenever their eyes meet. Marwan pockets the spare bike lock key as soon as they’re back in the loft, and he and Luca sit down for dinner half just about an hour later. They talk and laugh while they eat, and even though the wine they’ve bought on their way home doesn’t have the right temperature yet, it tastes heavenly.

After dinner, they clear the kitchen together and they become a little quieter. As Marwan puts the last plates away, Luca steps up behind him and wraps his arms around his waist. 

Luca noses at the nape of Marwan’s neck, and a shiver of arousal runs through Marwan’s body, yet again. It feels familiar, yet it feels so different now. He turns around in Luca’s arms and captures Luca’s lips in a slow and deep kiss. 

“I want—”

Luca’s hips slowly rock against his, and Luca nods. “Yeah,” he breathes, and Marwan shivers again. “Yes, I want that, too.”

In the bedroom they undress each other, mapping each other’s bodies with caresses and kisses, and when they sink down onto the mattress, Marwan’s thoroughly drunk with desire. He’s achingly hard, but he somehow feels as if he could do this forever, just touching and kissing and exploring and drawing those intoxicating sounds from Luca’s lips.

That is, until Luca parts Marwan’s legs with his knee and, his hand still stroking Marwan’s cock, settles between them. The urge to spread his legs for Luca becomes overwhelming so he can’t help but give in to it, and when Luca’s fingers touch him there his eyelids flutter closed, and he exhales.

Luca takes his time working him open, coating his fingers with lube again and again, and by the time Luca has three fingers inside of him, Marwan is _this close_ to begging.

The state Luca’s in isn’t much better, though, so right before Marwan snaps, Luca withdraws his fingers and reaches for a condom. Marwan’s hand catches Luca’s wrist before he can pick it up.

“Wait, Luca, I—” He clears his throat and tries again. It’s difficult to form words with his cock throbbing like that; and with the shine of the pre-come he can see on Luca’s drawing all his focus speaking is nearly _impossible_. “Last time I tested negative and—and I haven’t. Since then. With anyone. And we’ve already—”

Once again, Luca freezes in mid-movement, and his eyes go even wider than they already were. “Yeah,” he says, biting his lips. “Me too.”

Marwan’s fingers slowly open, letting go of Luca’s wrist, and he sinks back into the pillows. He nods.

“Are you sure?” Luca asks, and Marwan nods again.

“Yes,” he says. “Yes, I am. I’m sure.”

Luca swallows thickly, then he lets the condom drop back onto the mattress and reaches for the lube. He coats himself, and he’s worrying his lip between his teeth again. The small gesture tears a hole in Marwan’s chest, and he reaches up to touch. “God, Luca,” he murmurs, running over Luca’s lips with his thumb. “You’re so fucking beautiful, you have no idea. I want you so much…”

Luca smiles. Then he positions himself, fingers still loosely wrapped around his cock, and searches for Marwan’s eyes.

Marwan nods once more and his chest expands. There’s nothing he wants more at this moment than to feel Luca inside of him.

“Why am I so nervous?” Luca chuckles as he guides the tip of his cock to Marwan’s entrance. “I want this so much, you, and I’m so fucking nervous, and I don’t even know…”

“I’m not,” Marwan says, smiling a little. “I want you.”

The sensation of Luca sliding into him is indescribable. Marwan’s body just gives, and once Luca is all the way inside, they lock eyes again. Luca’s eyes are hooded with desire, and he’s trembling with the effort to hold back.

“Oh god, Marwan,” Luca whispers when his cock swells even more, and Marwan runs his hands down Luca’s sides until they come to rest at the small of his back. Luca brushes his lips over Marwan’s, and their breaths become one.

For the longest time, neither of them speaks. It’s slow and tender and beautiful, and their arousal builds and builds, with Luca moving inside of Marwan with perfect strokes, and Marwan’s hand wrapped around himself, stroking himself in the same tantalizing rhythm.

Luca loses himself in Marwan, and his unbridled desire is Marwan’s undoing. They fall at the same time, clutching at each other, skin-to-skin and face-to-face; so unbearably close it breaks Marwan’s defenses completely. He shatters in Luca’s arms, and Luca is there to catch him, to hold him together, while he grants Marwan the incredible privilege to do the same for him.

It takes them an eternity to come down and Luca stays inside of Marwan the entire time. When he slips out much, much later, he brings his hand between Marwan’s legs again, and when he lightly rubs at Marwan’s entrance with his thumb Marwan’s eyes squeeze shut and a hoarse huff escapes his lips.

“Don’t—” he murmurs, trying to reach for Luca’s hand, but he’s too blissed out to move. “It’s—I—”

“Shhhhhh,” Luca shushes, gently rubbing Marwan there again. There is so much tenderness in his touch, and in his words, too, that Marwan can feel it everywhere. “It’s okay. I’ve got you.” And when a bit of Luca’s come seeps out, Luca spreads it over Marwan’s entrance, and this is when Marwan’s world shatters into a million pieces. This all-consuming intimacy touches him so deep he already knows he’ll never be able to fully understand.

“Luca, I—”

He feels as if he’s coming again, but he can’t be, and it’s just Luca’s fingers still there that make his pulse fly to unknown heights. 

Eventually, Luca scoots up and settles into Marwan’s arms, one leg slung over Marwan’s, his cock sticky against Marwan’s skin. Marwan catches Luca’s hand in his and kisses it, and that’s how they drift off, entangled, blissed out, together.


	10. Chapter 10

“I’m going to the station alone this time,” Luca says after breakfast. He has booked a new flight for the early afternoon, and he’s holding Marwan’s hand across the table while he speaks. “If you come with me again, I won’t be able to leave.”

Marwan nods. “When—”

“Soon,” Luca cuts in, giving Marwan’s hand a firm squeeze. “We will find time. We will make time.”

Marwan nods again. He knows Luca is right, and he knows they will, but the mere thought of letting Luca go now is excruciating. 

“Come to Rome in September. Or in October if you can’t make it in September.” Luca says, and Marwan nods once more. 

Luca squeezes Marwan’s hand again, then he nods his head once before he lets go of Marwan’s hand and rises.

“I’m going alone this time,” Luca repeats, quickly walking around the table. He leans down and captures Marwan’s mouth in a brief but deep kiss, and he lets his hand rest on Marwan’s shoulder for a moment before he picks up his bag and walks up the stairs.

Marwan doesn’t look after him, and when the door falls shut, he flinches.

He doesn’t know how long he sits there with his back to the stairs, but when his phone buzzes, it’s already half past one. 

It’s Matthias.

“Yeah,” Marwan answers the call, unable to say more.

“What’s the matter?” Matthias asks. Apparently, he’s being that obvious again. “Where’s Luca?”

“Back home,” Marwan says after a short pause, and his voice sounds hollow even to him. “He left. He’s—he’s gone.”

“You idiot,” Matthias says, and Marwan can hear how he’s rolling his eyes on the other side of the line. “When’s his flight?”

“Take-off’s in thirty,” Marwan says, letting his eyes wander around the loft. There’s the spare key lying in front of him on the table, the vase Marwan didn’t know he had with the wilting flowers right next to it, the bed’s still unmade, and there’s that rolling pin on the kitchen counter, and the _caffettiera_ that Luca bought on his second day here is sitting right there on the stove. Marwan checks his phone again. It’s one thirty-two. 

“It’s not just three more days, then, is it?” Matthias asks, and Marwan shakes his head. “What you—What you have. What you want.”

“No. No, it’s not. Listen, I—I have to go,” he says and ends the call before Matthias can say anything else. He opens Luca’s messages.

 _don’t go_ , he types and sends immediately. He rises from his chair, almost knocking it over, and he all but runs up the stairs.

_don’t get on that plane, don’t leave. please. stay where you are, i’m coming._

He grabs his keys and his wallet and pulls the door open – and freezes.

Luca’s there, right there, in front of Marwan’s door, his bag in his hand and his hair a mess. All Marwan can do is stare.

Luca’s fingers uncurl and his bag drops to the floor, and Luca shrugs helplessly, shaking his head.

“I didn’t—I couldn’t—” he tries, and then again. “I—”

Marwan doesn’t know who moves first, but the next Moment Luca’s lips are on his and his are on Luca’s, and they’re inside, Marwan crowding Luca against the door, and Luca’s tongue is in his mouth, and it’s all there is and all there ever will be.

Them.

When they break their kiss for air, Marwan touches his forehead to Luca’s, and inhales shakily. It takes some time until he can open his eyes, but when he can, Luca’s eyes flutter open as well, and Luca smiles.

“I _will_ have to go back eventually,” Luca says, his voice warm and soft like afternoon sunlight. 

“I know,” Marwan says, claiming Luca’s lips again, and he knows that when Luca does leave, they’ll be okay with it. It will be okay then. They will be okay because they will know that they will be together again soon. “But not now, _ya hayati_. Not now.”

“No, not now,” Luca smiles back. “Not now. But when—We’ll come up with something, yes?”

“Yes.”

There are a million things Marwan longs to say to Luca, but they have time. They rest in Marwan’s heart, and they need to rest there for a little while before they can be shaped into words. It feels good to have them there, and Marwan knows that they’re in Luca’s heart, too. So, for now all he says is this – _Yes_.

~fin~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is it. Thank you so much for all your support, the cheerleading, for leaving so many so very lovely comments, for leaving kudos, for reading. Writing this was so much fun - thank you for sharing that fun with me!!! *smooches*

**Author's Note:**

> I'm [sal-si-puedes](https://sal-si-puedes.tumblr.com/) on tumblr - come and say "Hi!"! :)


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